House

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4th And Goal

Foreman marches into House's office, only to find him in the middle of an interview with a prospective new assistant. By sheer coincidence, it's Foreman's brother, Marcus! House happily offers Marcus the job (as House's assistant) that up until now didn't exist, much to Foreman's obvious horror. House beams that he's just trying to help a guy who paid his debt to society (although not a guy who served in the military for three deployments) and needs a job as part of his parole. Foreman updates House on 77's condition before calling his brother out into the hall for what promises to be an unpleasant conversation, since he can't say Marcus's name without gritting his teeth.

In the hall, Marcus takes a second to sulk about how his brother hasn't even asked him about prison before Foreman lightly pushes him against a wall and orders him not to work at PPTH. Marcus says that appears to be House's decision, not Foreman's. And this way, they can work together and Foreman can help Marcus get access to the hospital pharmacy. Foreman does not think that is funny. Foreman doesn't think anything is funny, though. He stays silent, glaring at Marcus as he complains about how Foreman couldn't be bothered to visit him in jail or pick him up when he was released before saying it's "justified" and he's determined to win Foreman back over. Foreman doesn't respond to any of that, just saying that House didn't offer this job to Marcus to be a nice guy. "He only wants to use you to screw with me," Foreman says. "You know how you could screw with him? Act like your brother getting a job doesn't screw with you," Marcus says. Good point, but Foreman thinks the best thing that could happen right now is for Marcus to refuse House's job offer. Sorry, Foreman, but once House gets his hooks into someone, he doesn't give up. So you're screwed whether Marcus takes the job or not. Marcus says he doesn't have the "luxury" of being able to turn jobs down. Funnily enough, neither does Foreman.

It's a bright new day when Wilson stumbles into his bathroom for his morning pee. He suddenly finds that he isn't alone, although this time instead of House in the bathtub, he finds a nasty possum. I think it roared. Twice. Wilson lets out a series of "oh!"s and "HOUSE!"s before running away.

Back at PPTH, Taub reports that 77's heart appears to be working fine just before Marcus walks in with a Frappuccino made to House's exacting specifications: light whip, two extra shots. Foreman is not pleased about this, naturally. House, meanwhile, will have plenty of time to pump Marcus for information about Foreman since he and his new assistant will apparently be sharing all of their meals together. Their breakfast proved to be a goldmine for House, who eagerly lets the other Cottages in on an embarrassing moment from Foreman's past: when he wet the bed during a sleepover at Bobby Sampson's house. While the others laugh, Foreman maintains that he just spilled a drink. The fact that he feels the need to defend himself even now tells me that he totally did wet the bed. Foreman tries to change the subject to medical stuff that he hopes Marcus won't be able to be a part of, but even then he is thwarted when Marcus mentions Hank Gathers, a college basketball star who collapsed and died during a game due to a hypertrophic cardiomyopathy. House says it's consistent with 77's symptoms, although Foreman thinks he's more into the person who thought of it than he is the diagnosis itself. "I don't care where an idea comes from as long as it makes sense and embarrasses someone,'" House says.

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House

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