House
No Reason

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Sara M: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Ballbuster

Cameron says that they had to biopsy the patient's tongue, and House figures they only did this after running a battery of less-painful and less-invasive blood tests that told them nothing. Oh, Cameron and her reliance on those scientific tests that don't cause the patient undue harm. What a silly goose she is! The biopsy told them nothing, and House figures that they couldn't do an LP because of intercranial pressure. He smiles smugly in his ability to know everything even after being out of it for two days.

And then a man is wheeled into the space next to him. He's hard to recognize without the gun, but it's House's shooter. While Cameron explains that he was also shot when security got him trying to escape the hospital, House removes all the wires connecting him to the bed and walks off to talk to Cuddy about this incredible oversight. In the hallway, Cameron urges House to get back to bed before he rips his stitches, to which House dares her to try to stop him. When Cameron does, House tells her to get her hands off of him, as he's twice her size and apparently not above using his superior physical prowess on her. This might be entertaining to watch, the cripple/very recent two gunshot victim and the wee movement-inhibiting vest/corset-wearing doctor wrestling, but it doesn't happen. Cameron just stuns House with her ability to understand what he means when he orders her to check Harpo's "trash," that being his lymph system, where the waste of whatever is attacking his body's is being dumped. She's so proud of herself for figuring this out that she totally forgets about stopping House from walking around.

House wheels his morphine drip into Cuddy's office, and shame on her for not being by his bedside for those two days instead of Cameron! After all, shouldn't the hospital she runs be able to keep the crazy gun-wielding former patients at bay? And where is the gratitude for those two ass injections he gave her that were the only bright spots in last week's episode? Cuddy immediately knows that House is there to yell at her about his new roommate, and says that they have no other place to put the shooter, as PPTH is full of patients today (which is easy to do since the place only has, like, five patient rooms). Cuddy says that they have House's assailant handcuffed to the bed and sedated so he won't be able to harm House again. Because I'm sure the sight of the man who tried to kill you resting peacefully next to you isn't mentally harmful at all. I think Cuddy's hormone injections came with an extra dose of stupid.

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House

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