Occam's Razor

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 14 USERS: A+
The Simplest Explanation...

House is back at the clinic and playing Metroid while he and his patient wait for Cuddy to answer his page. House says it will be a while, since Cuddy was in the middle of a round of golf. He kindly offers his GBA to the patient to help pass the time. Foreman enters and says he ran some thyroid tests, and that Brandon doesn't have hypothyroidism. Without even thinking of the possibility that he could be wrong, House simply says that the lab tests are unreliable. Why do they even have a lab in this hospital if they're just going to dismiss results they don't like? Foreman says that Brandon's recovery doesn't necessarily mean House was right; maybe Brandon's immune system fought off the infection on its own. He just can't believe Brandon got two illnesses at the same time. House cryptically says he's glad Foreman works here, and then asks if he wants to bet fifty dollars on whose theory is correct. The patient is so appalled by this that she looks up from the GBA, and Samus Aran dies. House grabs the GBA away from her, like he can do any better. Every time we see a screen shot of that game, it's always in exactly the same place. House tells Foreman to check Brandon's white blood cell count. If it's high, then Brandon did fight off an infection and Foreman wins fifty bucks. I hope Brandon's insurance covers doctors' wagers confirmation tests.

Foreman leaves the room and Wilson enters. Cuddy sent him over for House's consult, and he isn't very pleased to have his busy schedule interrupted. House resists the urge to shake his fist at the sky and shout "Cuuuuudddddddyyyyy!"

Chase and Cameron are alone in House's gigantic office/conference room area. Chase tries to pour himself a cup of coffee, but is so distracted by Cameron's boobies that he accidentally spills coffee all over himself. Will Cameron's reign of terror ever end? Will her totally work-related use of the word "sex" ever have consequences for her?!? Cameron walks over to Chase and apologizes if she made him feel awkward the other day, even though HE was the one who made the "ever taken a life" comment. She says she was trying to make a joke before because sex makes her uncomfortable. "Well, we don' talk about this..." Chase stammers. Oh, grow up, Chase. Cameron adds that sex really is terrifying. All kinds of dangerous things happen to your body when you have sex, and Cameron lists them all as Chase swallows and fidgets uncomfortably. Cameron says that if sex wasn't so "unbelievably fun," no one would do it. Chase is no longer able to speak, so Cameron moves on to comparing the durations of men's and women's orgasms. Men are "lucky" that they have one orgasm. Women, Cameron explains, can have hour-long orgasms. Tantric sex is a lady's best friend. Fortunately for Chase, Foreman and House enter before he can melt into a pile of hormone-y goo. Cameron grabs an apple and says hello to them like nothing happened. Chase stands facing the counter, hoping that no one asks him to move from there in the next five minutes or so.

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