So after the commercial, Cuddy meets with the rape lady, who won't get a real name in this episode although she's credited as "Eve" so I guess I'll call her that. I was thinking of calling her "Shitter" since I still have that in my clipboard, but then I decided that probably wasn't very sensitive. Eve says that she'd rather stick with House as her doctor. Cuddy tries to convince her otherwise, but Eve just gets all angry-looking and asks Cuddy if she knows what she's dealing with. Oh, don't even play that card, Little Missy. Cuddy says she doesn't, even though I think House was close enough to rape Cuddy a little when he was standing behind her before. Cuddy extols the benefits of PPTH's psychiatrist, saying that she would be better at handling this than House, since it's only been "less than a week" since Eve was raped, and House is the first person she told about it. Well, that is one fast-acting STD she got. This might not be the right time to tell Eve that she should really come back for an STD re-test after a few months have passed and anything that was introduced to her system has had time to settle in. She may have tested negative for HIV and herpes now, but that doesn't mean they aren't there! She might also want to get an actual rape kit done as opposed to just a vaginal swab. When I worked at that hospital, we'd get the occasional rape victim panel, and there would be a swab from every orifice. Just awful. Anyway, Eve demands to have House as her doctor.
So House returns to the room and asks Eve why she wants him. "I don't know," she says. He says he doesn't want to treat her. She assumes he doesn't want to treat her now that he knows she's been raped, but he says that he never wanted to treat her. Now he just has an excuse to get out of it. Plus, as he points out, there's nothing he can do for her at this point. Physically, she's healthy. She needs a mental doctor for her mental problems. Eve says that she understands, but then insists that House be her doctor. And again, Eve doesn't know why. I wish green slime would pour on her head every time she said that like it did on You Can't Do That On Television. Since Eve has Been Through Something, PPTH has to function without one of its necessary doctors (in fact, its only necessary doctor) and bend to her will. Hmm. I seem to dislike the rape victim. That's...not good. I don't want to know what it says about me that this whiny rape girl is getting on my nerves, so I'll just try really hard to like her. It's still early in the episode; there's plenty of time for her to improve. Like maybe she could have answers for people's questions instead of saying "I don't know" and expecting that to be enough. That would be a good start. Eve says that she "trusts" House. "That's a bad reason," says House. "I don't care," Eve says. Um...Eve? Seriously? You may not want to put blind trust into guys you don't know very well. That could get you-- oh. Right. Well, lightning does strike twice, so...think about it. I'm just saying. House thinks that Eve is trying to assert some control after having control taken away from her. "I'm raping you?!" Eve asks. House says that she is, albeit in a "non-invasive" and "more annoying" way. Eve turns into the crazy angry Eve we saw before, and orders House to get the hell out of her room. Well, that didn't take long. It's for the best for everyone, though. House shouldn't talk to rape victims. Ever. Any kind of victim, really, but especially not rape victims. And by the way, I'm just going to say right now that I'm probably not going to treat what happened to Eve with the kind of sensitivity it requires. This is mostly because, on the second viewing, she got really fucking annoying. I liked her more the first time when I still hoped the episode would mean something. Also, Eve is a fictional character who has gone through a fictional tragedy. I have such a limited amount of sensitivity and empathy in me that I can't afford to waste it on people who aren't real. So I'm sorry if I offend any real people.