Back at PPTH, the pain in Jeff's legs has subsided. But it's not gone completely, which means the pain must be coming from both Jeff's body and his brain. They still don't know what's wrong with Jeff.
The Cottages assemble in the meeting room, but there's a visitor. An older gentleman asks for House, and House immediately points him to Foreman, who just looks at House, mildly annoyed. The guy doesn't believe him, and hands the real House a bill for his services. It's the lawyer House claimed was working for him in that letter he was writing, which apparently was a threatening letter to his insurance company so they'd pay for his broken pipe. He hands House a bill for the services he didn't render and says the next time House makes a false claim like that, it'll be a lawsuit. And a bill. He leaves, but have we seen the last of lawyer Chris Kerrick? Maybe he's this season's villain story arc. Every other time House has messed with a professional, it's turned into one, so why not this time, too? The Cottages suppress laughter while Foreman glares at House, who says he tells people he's not House since the time when that guy asked which one of them was House and then shot him. Continuity x2!!! Except that House tried to say one of the Cottages was House that time, too. And it also didn't work. And with that, everyone gets paged.
This time, Zach's the person in pain. He's lying on the floor of the hospital, screaming. And the nurses thought the best thing to do was to take the time to find out who he was at PPTH to see and then who that guy's doctors are? While the mother begs for this not to be the same thing that's wrong with Zach's father and everyone stands over the kid looking concerned, House decides that Zach is faking. He limps to Jeff's room and finds an empty bottle of rubbing alcohol in his bed. Yes, he used Zach to distract everyone so he could kill himself. There won't be enough therapy in the world for Zach now. Not like the suicide watch people really needed to be distracted, since I don't think there is anyone on suicide watch and if there is, he or she clearly sucks at it. Kumar and Taub rush to get Jeff some life-saving dialysis while House goes off to yell at the kid. He lifts him to his feet, and Zach claims he's hurting him. Great, that's another traumatizing memory. I once had a fourth grade teacher who was evil, so she sent me out in the hall for accidentally bringing a pencil to the reading group. When she yelled at me, she grabbed my wrist so hard that it left marks. Although I guess in comparison to all the other stuff Zach's experienced in this episode, this is pretty minor. House tells Zach the pain will help him do a better acting job next time he tries to fake it so his dad can kill himself. Zach sobs that House can't help his father and begs him to let Jeff die already. I'm having a hard time buying any of this. Kids really don't have the capacity to understand that a parent would be better off dead and not in pain than alive and in pain.









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