House
Painless

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Everybody Hurts

House greets the Cottages with this: "testicles. What do they make you think of?" Taub immediately lists off way too many things, but none of them are the answer House is looking for, which is epilepsy. It can cause chronic pain if it spreads to the sensory region of the brain and rewires pain neurons, and if the seizures are taking place in a deep enough part of the brain, it won't show up on an EEG. And that part of the brain also controls the muscles that support the testicles.

House finds the family about to leave, which is nice because I really thought they were going to have House figure out the diagnosis after it was too late. "Feels like you got kicked in the nads, doesn't it?" House asks. Not in front of the child, House. Oh, whatever. He's heard and seen worse at this point. House clarifies, asking where Jeff's pain started. Jeff says in the stomach area. House asks if it felt like his kidneys were being pulled out through his scrotum. That rings a bell, as Jeff's next question is a cautiously hopeful "why?" "Because epilepsy is treatable," House says. The family all look at each other, not sure if they should hope or not. The music of success if playing, guys! You can!

The music of success, of course, heralds the beginning of the montage of wrapping things up. Jeff's balls are tested for epilepsy. Wife and son wait for the results. Cuddy brings Rachel to work with her and looks overwhelmed. And Jeff's balls test positive.

Jeff and his son walk hand-in-hand in the hall. I hope Jeff feels really stupid for trying to take himself away from moments like that. Taub and Kumar watch them go, and Taub says this is why you don't kill yourself. Kumar asks Taub if suicidal colleague was actually Taub himself. Duh, Kumar. Taub just says it wasn't, and leaves. Kumar watches him go. I don't think he believes Taub. I also think Kumar knows more about his co-workers than they know about each other and him. It pays to be a silent observer.

Foreman arrives at Clinical Trial HQ to find Hadley already there. She says she's feeling better and asks him out. He accepts, and goes off to get someone to fix her leaking IV bag. Outside, he tells the nurse to be more careful with the IVs, and the nurse comments that the Huntington's medicine smells bad. But Foreman didn't smell anything, which means, as the nurse spells out for us, that Hadley's getting the placebo. Whoops! I guess Hadley was only feeling better because Foreman gave her some of that false hope House was talking about. Also, this is the worst clinical trial ever. It's ridiculously obvious who is getting the real drug and who is getting the placebo, the nurses don't know how to set up IV bags so they don't leak all over the place, and one of the people running it is works with and has a personal relationship with one of the patients. Even if the Huntington's drug does actually work, the results won't be valid because of all the crap behind the scenes.

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House

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