House
Que Será Será

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Sara M: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Vogler II: Electric Vog-a-loo

About their comatose patient, Foreman says that they've ruled out Pickwick's syndrome and the steroid treatment has had no effect. In fact, George now has a fever. Cameron reports that House and George have "the same taste in home furnishings and women." So...Pier One and Frozen faces? No..."Danish modern and Russian gymnasts," House says. "Pianos and prostitutes," Cameron reports, and says that they should test George for neurosyphilis immediately because Cameron hates sex. How does Cameron know that House used a prostitute anyway? I mean, sure, he's mentioned it, but I would have always assumed he was kidding. She hangs out outside his house every night, doesn't she? House rejects this idea, saying that people only get STDs from people they trust and don't protect themselves from. When it comes to prostitutes, you're gonna triple-bag. And we all know that condoms are 100% effective, so there's no way you could get something from someone while wearing one. House insists that George's illness has something to do with his weight. He orders an MRI of his brain. Foreman points out that George exceeds the weight limit on the MRI and the CAT scan machines. House points out that they can either do an MRI or start George on a treatment that could be fatal if they're wrong about what he has.

The Cottages have managed to get George's gurney into the MRI room, but have no idea what to do next. George obviously won't fit in the narrow tube. Cameron says that George's head is all they need to scan, so if they just get him on the table, they'll be able to slide that much in. Foreman says that the table will collapse under George's weight and cost PPTH a million dollars. Hopefully, PPTH has some kind of deal with the MRI companies, since they break them so often. Cameron wants to throw caution to the wind, saying that the four hundred and fifty pound weight limit is just an estimation. Chase says that George isn't a few pounds over the limit -- he's a hundred and fifty. "He still deserves the same standard of care as anyone else," Cameron insists. And I guess everyone else deserves not to get their MRIs since the machine is broken. "You believe the machine will stand on principle?" Foreman asks. It might -- that MRI has a mind of its own. That mind tends to be evil, though, so it will probably fold up and eat George like a Venus Fly Trap. Which would be awesome. Cameron hopes that the power of her self-righteousness will enable her to George onto the MRI table all by herself, but it doesn't.

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House

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