Meanwhile in uninteresting plotlines, Wilson and Cuddy sit down to what I believe is Wilson's second lunch. They have a lot to discuss: will House ruin the gala? Will House not ruin the gala? And then those same two questions a few more times with the words in different order. Wilson scoffs as he pointedly suggests that House could do something so awful as to hire a mariachi band to crash the event. Cuddy laughs that she actually could get behind that evil scheme, because she tried to hire a mariachi band last year, but the board said it was too expensive. Was the theme of the gala "Old Acapulco"? Because that was the theme of my junior high prom. Wilson looks thoughtful as the plot thickens.
Over at ye old MRI machine, Amber writes notes to their newly-deaf patient, including one that pretends that his wife is on her way. Chase chastises her for lying to the patient and that whole pot-kettle-pants-on-fire thing. Amber reminds Chase that she is not actually married to the guy. Speaking of the guy, he is having a seizure. Based on this show, I can only assume that MRIs cause seizures. I mean, right? It's like an Easy Bake oven of symptoms: An ailing patient goes in and two minutes later comes out seizing or heart attacking or brain exploding. The guy is on a ventilator as all the doctors stand around and scratch their heads. His kidneys are now "fried", which I guess is the technical term, and he is in a coma. Note to self: Do not go in MRI machine. He's not viable for a transplant. Whatever is wrong with him now, he wouldn't survive the surgery to fix it... and he only has a few days to live. House stares at the patient for a while and decides that the guy obviously ate a brain tumor for breakfast and they should zap his head with radiation and start him on chemo. It's a Hail Mary pass because they have no idea what's really wrong with the guy, but he is close enough to dying that it really doesn't matter now and they can just throw a plate of medical spaghetti at him to see what sticks. Mmm spaghetti. Someone mentions that they will need the wife's consent for the chemo and House nominates Dr. Amber even though the wife hates her for some reason that is probably related to her husband revealing his double life to her first which CLEARLY means they are also having an illicit affair and he maxed out their credit cards buying her lingerie to wear under her naughty school girl outfit.
Dr. Amber is having a low self esteem moment and no amount of yogurt eating with friends or laughing alone with salad will cheer her up. Know what she needs? Some positive reinforcement from an attractive older male. She explains to Chase that she has a sad, because she gave up friends and a social life for a career because girls with brains can't have friends because all the other less smart women want to talk about is tanning sprays and fat free muffins and then they sing songs into their hairbrushes. She just can't relate and is pretty sure they are intimidated by her Very Big Brain. Women all hate other women! End of story. Amber is also sad because she can't find a date to bring to the charity gala a.k.a. a work party. Chase ignores that part and tells her to be nice to the patient's wife, which he realizes is a challenge what with them both being women and all. Chase recommends that if there is a choice between brutal honesty or offering her a touch of hope, she should choose hope. Now, why couldn't her Very Big Brain tell her that?