House

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LuluBates: A | 1182 USERS: B
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Diagnosis: Pants Afire

Amber goes to talk to the wife. She explains that he is in a coma and might have a brain tumor and he may die, but there is still hope. The woman wants to talk to her husband and while Amber really REALLY wants to tell her that her husband has gone deaf, she doesn't. She's nice like that. The woman goes to sit by her husband's bedside. She apologizes for saying all those awful things to him, she loves him, and didn't mean it when she said she was mad at him for lying to her, going to a fake job every day, taking out a double mortgage on the house, and maxing out all their credit cards and never telling her the truth. She's not mad at him for that at all. Besides, she didn't tell him something important too: She's pregnant! He's going to be a dad! Contrary to what we normally see on television after such a tearful confession/blessed event, he doesn't suddenly blink and smile and wake. Probably because he's deaf. Otherwise that totally would have happened. Dr. Amber almost has an aneurysm watching this woman whisper in the ear of her deaf husband.

House stares at the long list of symptoms plaguing his patient: fever, swollen joints, rash, conjunctivitis, hearing loss, kidney failure. There must be a connection between the reoccurrence of the rash and the rest of the symptoms. What did they do to cause the rash to flare up again? Everyone tosses ideas around into a great big salad of diseases. Then House stares into the middle distance and you know he's got it, by Jove. House blurts, "Caps," which I assume is an acronym for whatever obscure genetic disorder the guy has. Something about cold-induced auto inflammatory syndrome, it's super rare so you probably don't have it. Probably. Foreman points out that it is extraordinarily rare, but House shrugs, because super rare happens on a show that has to come up with new strange diseases every single week. He tells the team to fill the guy up with whatever drug fixes this genetic disorder and the guy will live a long and healthy life lying to his wife and child and digging his way out of debt. Good luck with that! The team heads downstairs to fix the guy up, but... it's too late! The guy is coding and no amount of medical intervention will prevent the slow sad song from swelling up as the doctors struggle to revive him and the wife cries in the corner. I can't believe I got to recap a show where the patient actually dies. Talk about a rare occurrence! Oh, the honor and the privilege. No one is happy except me right now.

House

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