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Sara M: A- | Grade It Now!
Everybody Apologize

The three male Cottages are charmed and pleased to meet Valerie, while Hadley is clearly jealous and resentful. Oh, waaah, Hadley. You can't always be the most beautiful woman in room. 99% of the time will just have to do. Also, I see they decided to cast the part of her ugly husband, as he's sitting at her bedside. Poor guy. I was sort of hoping we wouldn't see him at all, thus sparing the actor the embarrassment of getting this role. But at least he'll get paid, unlike all the other ugly guys who tried out for it and didn't get the part.

Wilson comes to work to find House napping in his office. House explains that he's avoiding his actual office because "some idiot" who had the misfortune of going to med school at the same time as House wants to stop by have lunch with him. And that idiot would be the mysterious Wibberly. And he is an idiot. Not even Cuddy is stupid enough to want to be House's friend (anymore). Only Wilson, who doesn't understand why House can't just tell the guy to leave him alone. House explains that, as part of his therapy (that I thought we were all supposed to forget about by now) he wrote an apology letter to Wibberly for switching their final papers in a class on flatworm genetics. I think they both should get a letter from their professor apologizing for making them suffer through a class about flatworm genetics. Apparently, the professor hated House (can't imagine why!) and House thought he was being graded unfairly because of it, so he submitted his paper under Wibberly's name and Wibberly's paper under his to try to prove it, unbeknownst to Wibberly. But then House got an A for Wibberly's paper, so he figured he must have been wrong about his theory and his papers really were just not very good. Which means poor Wibberly got House's bad grade. Yes, these schemes do have a way of backfiring on us even when they go exactly as planned. One time, in tenth grade, we had this grade-wide social studies project (yes, we still took "social studies" at the backasswards high school I attended. I had to wait until college to actually study history) and my friend, who was in a different class, did hers in an earlier quarter of the year and got an A+ on it. I handed her paper in to my teacher just to see if I'd get the same grade because I wanted to prove that he hated me and was grading me unfairly. Sure enough, he gave me a C. I was right! Except then I couldn't actually do anything about it, because that would mean admitting that I had used someone else's paper and then I probably would have gotten an F. So all I did was prove something I knew anyway: my teacher was a dick. Anyway, Wilson wants to know why, out of all the people House hurt over the years, he chose some guy he mildly screwed over all the way back in medical school to apologize to and not, say, Cuddy. Or Wilson. House doesn't really have an answer, so Wilson leaves the room disgustedly.

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