House
House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 1076 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Sex Kills, Again

Parents, daughter, and boyfriend are assembled in the hospital room. Foreman asks them if they brought any new soap into the house, or if Melinda might have snuck out of it, which I'm sure she'll be happy to admit in front of her parents. Both charges are denied, Melinda adding her own commentary about how her parents keep her trapped in the house like a prisoner and she demands that Foreman tell her parents that she's better and can be let wild and free again, a request that might have a little more weight behind it if the requestor wasn't sitting in a hospital bed after almost dying a few days ago. Stupid. Foreman says that if they can find out what she's allergic to, then her chances of being freed from the confines of her bedroom are good, at which point Melinda snots an "I told you so" to her mother, who snots a "can I speak to your outside, please" to Foreman.

Out in the hall, Mom asks Foreman to lie to her daughter instead of giving her hope that she'll go outside soon. Foreman scoffs and tries to launch into a story of how his mother used to be overprotective, but Mom stops him and says that she knows that she's overprotective and she's seen Finding Nemo, although I don't know what that has to do with this situation, since it's not like Nemo had a heart transplant or allergies. Also, he was a fish. Michelle Trachtenberg does kind of have fish lips, but other than that I fail to see the comparison. ["He was also defective, with the one wee fin?" -- Wing Chun] Anyway, Foreman calls Mom "one of the most overprotective parents [he's] ever seen," which is impressive considering the fact that he's only seen her for about three seconds so far. Mom doesn't care what Foreman has to say, and she's got some pretty astounding facts to back her behavior up with: her daughter is severely allergic to a lot of things, for which she was hospitalized three times when she was younger. Six months ago, her parents left her home alone for a weekend for the first time, and Melinda took advantage of the opportunity to go out and immediately eat some peanut-infected chocolate cookies, forget her Epipen at home, try to drive herself to the hospital, pass out on the way there, and get in a car accident in the course of which the steering wheel crushed her chest and destroyed her original heart. My guess is that Melinda wasn't wearing her seat belt at the time because she's a freaking moron. Doesn't the Evil Transplant Committee have rules against giving hearts to stupid people? So Mom may be the most overprotective parent Foreman has ever seen, but she also has one of the dumbest children. I think they balance each other nicely.

House

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