House
Safe

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Sara M: B- | Grade It Now!
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Sex Kills, Again

Over at PPTH, Melinda isn't getting any better after her first electrophoresis session. "Why do these things keep happening to me?" she wonders. I can't vouch for the latest medical crisis, but I would have to say that maybe if you hadn't eaten that cookie and forgotten to bring your medicine for your deadly allergies along with you, you would have at least avoided the heart transplant, hmm? Dan watches from the other side of the glass, but Melinda doesn't want to see him. She just wants the Mommy that she claimed to hate so much.

Later, Foreman and Mom share a moment during which she makes it clear that she never wanted her daughter to be sick like this after all her efforts to keep her safe, a line that didn't make much sense except that it throws in a little Munchausen's-by-proxy red herring. Melinda loses control of her throat muscles and can no longer breathe. Chase and Foreman have to intubate.

Foreman and Chase call House at home and tell him that Melinda's condition has worsened too quickly for her to have Guillian-Barré. When House finds out that Cuddy is now in charge of Melinda's case after Melinda's parents "lost confidence" in House and his team, he says he'll be right in. But first, he must take the time to place sleeping Wilson's hand in a pot of water. Gee, I can't imagine why the Melindarents wouldn't have faith in a guy who'd rather make his friend pee in his sleep than rush to their dying daughter's aid.

Early in the morning, the Cottages wonder if Melinda has been poisoned somehow, due to the rapid onset of her paralysis. The Munchausen's red herring rears its head again! But then everyone remembers that the poisoning storyline was last week, and they forget about it. House thinks they should look at the patient herself. She's so stubborn that she found a way to have sex with her boyfriend right under her overprotective mother's nose, which House tastefully refers to as Dan "bringing the hot beef." I really want to know how lines like that get past the censors, but we aren't allowed to hear a guy pee into a toilet. Maybe, House reasons, Melinda's stubbornness extended to eating food filled with botulism, even though this was already dismissed as an option since botulism paralysis is descending, and Melinda's is ascending. They can find out for sure by injecting a rat with Melinda's blood and watching it die, although House will not allow them to use Steve McQueen for this. While they do that, House will go interrogate Melinda on her eating habits until she cracks and admits to something.

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