Chase and Cameron also pick this moment to enter, and Foreman tells them that House is back in charge and their new patient is a porn star. Chase and Cameron say they will not be dealing with any of that, as they quit, effective immediately. Wow, way to be professional and give appropriate notice, you two. Cuddy is shocked; Foreman and House are not so much. "We'll miss you," Foreman says, probably not meaning it. The Cameron-Chases go off to clear out their lockers, followed by a distraught-looking Cuddy. I think it's more because she knows House will now have to hire new Cottages and what a headache that will be for her, than the loss of Chase and Cameron, though. Although their leaving does put some giant holes in the ER and surgery departments. Like, the entire departments. House orders Foreman to run a series of tests on Hank all by himself.
Foreman gets ready to do an LP on Hank, who reveals that he's happily married to another porn star. Foreman asks if that causes jealousy between them. Hank claims it doesn't, since porn is "a job" and they don't let their work lives and home lives intersect. Well, except for the fact that they probably met through work in the first place. And their work requires them to do things that society says are only supposed to be done in one's home life. But they managed to do all of that better than Foreman and Hadley could, so ha ha! Hank says that he's not a porn star because he's a drug addict with mental issues -- he's a "nice Jewish boy" who does this because he wants to and because he believes in it. And then his arm muscles suddenly contract painfully.
House shows up in Taub's very modern plastic surgery office to give him a list of symptoms: photophobia, muscle spasms and a giant penis. And also an offer for Taub to re-join the team, saying he has three open spots and four candidates. He does not say that two of those candidates just quit. Taub says his current job is pretty cushy: he leaves at 6 every day and has weekends off. Also, cool lighting in his office. House calls that "dull" and asks for Taub's differential. Taub decides that House is correct that working for him is where he should be and starts for his coat, offering a few diagnoses as he allows House to exit the room first. And then shuts the door behind him and goes back to his boring but cushy job.
House goes to Hadley's apartment next (UGH WHY COULDN'T SHE JUST STAY IN THAILAND FOREVER??) and says that Taub thinks the problem is in Hank's brain. "Thailand was wonderful. Thanks for asking," Hadley says obnoxiously, adding that she has an interview for a job at some Community Health Clinic in a few hours. House says if she wants one of the spots on his team, she should really focus her energy on coming up with the right diagnosis. Hadley closes the door in his face.









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