And so, Stewart is too afraid to leave his house, but he's perfectly fine with an inexperienced surgeon performing an operation in his not-so-sterile home. Okay. This doesn't make any sense anymore. House was right -- pain overrules fear, and if this were real life, the pain of an obstructed bowel would have driven Stewart willingly to PPTH a long time ago. Also, if this were real life, no one would take all this time and money to treat the guy who refused to leave his house and assaulted fellow health care workers in an effort to stay in there. But this isn't real life, so I'll go with it. But I can only suspend my disbelief so far, and I'm having trouble with this episode. Taub is doing the surgery and Kumar is assisting, much to his annoyance. He grouses at being told to do some suctioning, saying he went to "med school, not nurse school." But I thought that nurses on this show were only good for cleaning up bodily fluids on the floor and bringing the doctors peppermint tea. Since when did they get to suction, too? And since when did doctors not suction? I'm pretty sure they do it on other hospital shows. There's plenty of sucking over at Grey's Anatomy, for example. House and Stewart's lawyer are observing, although neither is wearing a surgical mask, because why not make an already questionably sterile room even less so?
House checks out a piece of Stewart's intestine under a microscope, and notes that the villi are flattened, which means intestinal atrophy. Cameron diagnoses this as Whipple's disease, which is what you get when you squeeze the Charmin. Well, he did warn you. House says that explains all of Stewart's symptoms, and then Taub sees a bleeder that needs to be cauterized. This gets House's attention, and he turns and yells at Taub about all that gas trapped behind the bowel obstruction, but it's too late and Taub has set Stewart's farts on fire. How embarrassing! House puts the fire out and tells them to treat Stewart for his burns and his Whipple's and he'll be just fine. Meanwhile, has Kumar ever been a part of a medical procedure that didn't end in fire and tears? Maybe he should spend some time in fire-fighting school.
Sometime later, Chase stops by Stewart's house with some coffee for Cameron. He kindly offers to stay at her place tonight, but she says she'll be staying at Stewart's, since there's no one else to supervise his post-op healing. Also because Cameron is totally in love with Stewart. If that biopsy had shown terminal cancer and not Whipple's, they'd already be married. Sorry, Chase. He tries to argue, but Stewart calls out for Cameron, and she comes running. He says he can't feel his legs. Cameron's eyeballs turn into little hearts.