House
The Socratic Method

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Pennies From Hell

House wakes up Friedman's mom, and tells her he doesn't think she's crazy. Friedman's mom: "Neither do I! But I'm crazy." Heh. The Martins set her up to check her eyes, and Foreman says that if she has Wilson's, she'll have copper-colored rings around her eyes called "Kaiser-Fleischer rings." Long story short? She has them. So copper was the culprit in both of my episodes. If the writers of House are trying to convince me that pennies should be taken out of the U.S. monetary system, I can just tell them that they're preaching to the choir.

Friedman's mom receives treatment. She voice-overs a poem. Yeah, I'm transcribing that. The camera goes spinny, and sometime later, a bespectacled, sane Friedman's mom is reading the book aloud. Chase comes in and asks if she's ready to go home. She replies, "Almost," and then Friedman enters and gives her a big, teary hug. She tells him that he really needs a haircut. It's no coincidence that Chase is still in the room. Chase looks down, wishing his mom had had that stupid copper thing. ["Because then she would have told him to get a haircut?" -- Wing Chun] He leaves. Aw.

Friedman wheels his mom to the elevator. When it opens, we see House and Wilsensei. Those two will do it anywhere, won't they? Friedman hesitates but, at his mother's insistence, wheels her in. Friedman's mom says it's lucky she had cancer: "It's terrible having everybody think you're nuts." House: "Really?" Heh. Friedman's mom says she called to thank House, and he says she's welcome. Friedman grits that he's never thanking House, because House turned Friedman in. That is so much more important in the grand scheme of things than the fact that House saved his mom from the copper prison of her mind, and also from DYING AT AGE THIRTY-EIGHT. Deborah will be jealous that I get to say this one more time, but SHUT IT, Friedman. Friedman's mom just shifts uncomfortably until House rescues her, saying he just wanted Friedman out of his life: "That's why I had Doctor Cuddy call Social Services." Ha! The elevator reaches its destination, and Friedman wheels his mother away. Wilsensei asks if House is okay. House says that Wilsensei was right, and that the real problem had to do with the schizophrenia, not with the DVT. Wilsensei asks if it isn't House's birthday, as if he doesn't have the date tattooed on his ass. House closes his eyes in frustration, although that could have something to do with the fact that he didn't take a single Vicodin during this episode. He dealt with it better than in "Detox," though. And come to think of it, he didn't even watch General Hospital, either!

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House

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