House

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 1953 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Hold Me Closer, Tiny Dancer

House hovers over the toilet bowl, waiting to throw up again. Ah, that's always fun. Cuddy hands him some ginger for his nausea. He says he'd rather have Vicodin. Or pot. Or a coma. He's tried two out of three of those suggestions in this episode alone. And with that, he sees a lone Vicodin pill on the bathroom floor. Way to clean up, Cuddy. Have you ever dropped a pill on a tile floor? It's pretty noisy. How could she miss something so important? CTB appears to give House some advice on how to get the pill without Cuddy knowing. If he can just think of an excuse to get Cuddy out of the room, it'll be happy fun time again. House complains that the ginger is "too bitter," and she kindly (yet stupidly) goes off to put some honey in it. So much for knowing House well enough to save him from cheating. With Cuddy gone, CTB starts in on House, saying that he can't bring himself to admit defeat in front of Cuddy, but he also can't stop himself from taking that Vicodin. And, ultimately, he can't. With one look back to make sure Cuddy's out of sight, House crawls towards the pill. CTB watches from her position standing on the bathtub wall and says this is an interesting dilemma: if House takes the pill, then he "doesn't deserve" Cuddy. And if he takes it and doesn't tell her, then he doesn't deserve anyone. I'm starting to think that House's subconscious is kind of dark, you guys. It hates and resents everyone else, but it saves the worst of it for House himself. House gives up and reaches for the pill, but he was able to stop himself long enough for Cuddy to return and catch him in time with a dramatic "NO!" She grabs the pill and flushes it while House pathetically, but just as dramatically, screams "no!" And then, just to reach one of his lower points of existence, he sticks his hand in the toilet bowl to try to get the pill before it takes to the sewers and ultimately pollutes our drinking water and is the subject of one of those "there are millions of drugs in your water!" news specials. When the pill is gone, House recovers somewhat and seems as relieved and grateful as one can while feeling like absolute shit.

Off-camera because we really don't have time to adequately cover all the storylines this week, Taub came up with a way to save Penelope's hands and feet: inject her with vasodilators (think Viagra) and hopefully open her blood vessels back up and somehow cause the dead tissue to come back to life. Chase is certain it won't work -- until it does because we don't have time for anything but miracles.

House

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