House

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Sara M: B | 3 USERS: A+
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Personal Jesus

House finds Cuddy in the hallway. She admits that she doesn't want House at the ceremony, because it'll be full of love and friends and family and House is the opposite of all of those things. "Okay," House says simply. "That's it? You're really not coming?" Cuddy asks, looking just a little bit disappointed. "I'm really not coming," House says, looking like he doesn't really care one way or the other. He plays her like a violin.

Hadley joins Kumar and Taub in the lab. Of course, the conversation revolves around her and Foreman. Kumar thinks they should wait and House will eventually rehire Foreman. Taub thinks the opposite and agrees with House that they should break up before one of them cheats with another woman. What's with all the mentions of Hadley's bisexuality this week? Did they get yelled at by GLAAD for hooking her up with a man who instantly cured her reckless random sex with women or something? Whatever. Hadley reports that Danny's spleen looks fine except for traces of a few minor bugs that aren't even worth mentioning. Or are they?

House has returned to Danny for more religion talk. Also because Danny's lunch has arrived and he doesn't want his pudding cup. Mouth full of pudding, House asks Danny why people get all religious when they have kids. "Fear of the unknown -- cornerstone of faith," Danny says. Then he somehow figures out that House has "a thing" for Cuddy. Are psychic powers a symptom? This is ridiculous. House will only admit to being physically attracted to Cuddy and asks Danny why he's still a virgin even though his faith is gone. That's what I was wondering, too. "Who wants a relationship with a priest?" Danny asks. Probably a lot of women. I think it's some kind of weird fantasy, actually. House says it doesn't have to be a relationship.

Taub calls House outside. The Cottages have figured out what's wrong with Danny: a pneumocystis infection from the holy water. It's a minor and harmless bug that doesn't make anyone sick -- unless his immune system is already compromised by something else. Something like AIDS. And just think: Hadley was ready to dismiss it even though she's supposedly a better doctor than Taub and Kumar, who caught her mistake.

Danny refuses to believe he has AIDS, since he's never done anything to put himself at risk for it. But he'd rather keep his faith in that than have an AIDS test to prove it, just in case he gets a false positive. Normally, I'd say he's worried about nothing, but since the Cottages are the ones who run the AIDS tests and not qualified med techs with all sorts of protocol to follow to ensure their results are accurate, he probably has a right to be reluctant.

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House

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