In the x-ray room, Foreman and the Cottages explain to House that Alice has three screws in her leg from a skiing accident, and didn't tell them. Taub makes excuses, so House turns him around and writes on the back of Taub's lab coat, "EVERYBODY LIES." "Maybe this way it'll finally sink in," House says with uncharacteristic optimism. "She wants to die. We can't trust anything she says." Foreman says they burned up most of the day patching up Alice's leg and replacing the screws, and it'll take a week to find the pheochromowhatsis without an MRI, and longer if Alice doesn't stop lying to them. "Or we could figure out a way to find it in the 39 hours left on her psych hold," Taub says lamely. Thinking out loud, House says they need to get her cooperation by offering her something she wants. Foreman reminds House of what he said ten seconds ago, that Alice wants to die. "I can work with that," House says cheerfully. Is he kidding? That's like his medium of choice.
He goes back to Alice and tells her, "I want you to write more books." She says she's done, in more ways than one, and House finger-wags, "Now don't you say that, you dirty birdie." Props to the writers for only dropping one Misery reference into this episode. He tells her there are easier ways to go, and shows her the syringe he brought with him. "The best part? You'll feel so good you won't even notice you're dead." She's skeptical of his motives, so he explains that he's giving her a choice: "Give us a chance to make you better, or stick this anywhere and push." "Why do you care about me?" she asks, as though he didn't already answer that with his entrance line. He gives her a big speech about how he knows from pain, and how you think you can handle it until you can't, and then "you either find reasons to go on or you don't." She says she's out of reasons, but he promises that she'll want to live once she's pain free. "And if I'm wrong, I have a backup plan to take home with you." She accepts the syringe, and he advises her to hide it. Which she does -- right in her thigh. Wait, that's not what he meant! Or is it?
Well of course it is, as we see after the ads. House leans pensively over a gurney with a covered body on it, until the body moans and pulls the sheet off its face. "Good morning, Sunshine," House tells Alice. "You're a real bastard," Alice informs him. Is she trying to test out of this course? Good luck to her on that. "You were supposed to choose life," House lectures. He insists that she'll get better once they find and remove "that pesky adrenaline-secreting tumor," but all she says is that they better hurry, because she's out of there by tomorrow. Except, as House points out, she gave herself what she thought was a lethal injection, so that added 24 hours to her psych hold. "I know, bummer, right?" As he goes to leave, Alice drops this spoiler on him: "Jack Cannon dies. I know, bummer, right?" Get her, using the only weapon she has against the doctor who's basically kidnapped her, and who has about fifty.