House
Whac-A-Mole

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Passive-Aggressive

"The only way to cure me is to make me sicker?" asks Jack. That should just be the name of this show. House whips out a spray consisting of a cocktail of infections, explaining that each one has a fun way of revealing itself as the winner of the Which Genetic Immune Problem Does Jack Have? race. One will cause a seizure. Another will shut down Jack's lungs. The third will give him a heart attack. The fourth will give him the sneezies. "Hell, no," says Jack. House says that their only other option is to guess what Jack has, which means there's a 75% chance Jack's brother and sister will lose yet another loved one. Can't they just stick Jack in a clean room until they get the genetic test results back? Or maybe PPTH has given up on having clean rooms with House around. Jack changes his mind. House sprays him in the face, making sure to keep his own face covered.

The Cottages take turns watching Jack. When Foreman's on duty, Jack's lungs shut down. We have a winna!

Cuddy stops by House's office the next morning to inform him that "Li'l Orphan Annie" and "Oliver Twist" slept out in the hallway last night. Um, way to notice this enough to complain to Cuddy about it but not enough to actually help the kids out, there, hospital staff. House says that Jack was too busy having chronic granulomatous disease to get Will and Kama a babysitter. If they can find a bone marrow donor, they'll be able to "reboot" Jack's immune system and make him healthy again. The Cottages are already testing Will and Kama for compatibility. Cuddy has nothing more to yell at House for, so she leaves the room.

Foreman tells Jack that Will is a match. Instead of being happy, Jack is angry that no one asked his consent to test his siblings. He asks Foreman what will happen if he doesn't have the bone marrow transplant. Foreman says that he'll be sick all the time -- too sick to care for his brother and sister. Jack doesn't think Will is old enough to make an educated decision about whether he should put himself at risk -- a risk Foreman says is "next to nothing" -- in order to save Jack. Foreman says that Jack's wanting to protect Will over himself is admirable, but it's also impractical, since Will will be a lot less protected if Jack's dead. Jack says that he'll wait until Will turns eighteen before he'll let Will donate his bone marrow.

Back at the office, Foreman thinks Jack is noble. House, of course, thinks Jack is a moron. Foreman once again accuses House of being a hypocrite. He says that evidence and truth are supposed to be all that matters, but then, when House has plenty of evidence that Jack is a good guy who cares more about his brother and sister than he does himself, he still won't believe it. Foreman thinks House would rather believe that all people are selfish and bad. House rises to Foreman's challenge.

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House

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