How I Met Your Mother

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DeAnn Welker: A | 1 USERS: A+
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The Final Countdown

Ted finds Robin eating BRAN STIX cereal, with "15" essential vitamins. Ted says he did a bad thing last night, and went to "his" house. Robin: "Who?" Ted laughs because "hoo" reminded him of the owl footage. Anyway, he went to Sandy's to get him to listen to common sense and reasonable discourse. Robin hopes those aren't the names of his fists, but Ted says they're his feet; he's more of a kicker. Ted arrives, and Sandy answers his door, labeled "1413," with a bald head and an S&M scene going on behind him involving a bear in a bra and some leathered-up folks. Ted snaps a picture (Sandy smiles automatically), which Robin's delighted about because no one knows Sandy wears a toupee. Ted isn't sure she noticed the shit doing down behind Sandy, but Robin says he's actually very open about that weirdness, but not his bald head. Ted tells Robin his new advice is not to steer into the skid. It's to steer into Sandy and run him down. That is a philosophy I can get behind.

Back at Lily and Marshall's, his mom's still going on about her bathing suit, then asks if he's coming to Florida this summer, all "Are you coming? Are you coming?" Marshall tries to leave, and his dad asks where he's going. He won't say, so Lily butts in: "He's going to masturbate." Which opens the door for Marshall to tell his mom and dad everything, with a "12" Days of Christmas card or book or something behind him. Marshall's parents tell him they love him no matter what -- no baby, adopted baby, whatever. They even suggest Ted as a donor, which is hilariously dismissed. Then they send him back in to the bathroom to "blow dry his hair." Marshall wonders how they knew, and his mom points out they didn't have a hair dryer.

The next day, Robin comes home from work as Ted's reading a book about America's "11" greatest water towers. I know: WTF. [I love that Ted reads a boring architecture (kinda?) book like that, but the use of books and magazines in the countdown is getting old. - Z] He asks if it was Robin's last day at work, but she says it was actually good. Cut to Sandy making a mall joke and calling Robin "Sparkles." She says she has something they'll all want to see, and reaches to pull out what we think will be the toupee-less Sandy photo. But she says she didn't want to attack someone out of the blue like some kind of... Ted interjects: "Owl?" Robin: "Exactly." Instead, she says, she took Ted's advice and steered into the skid. Cut back to work, where she pulls out her Robin Sparkles acid-wash denim jacket, which now has a number "10" patch on the arm. Saget!Ted says she never shook the nickname, but Sparkles went on to do great things at World Wide News, especially after some other guy spilled a cup of coffee on himself and they all died laughing.

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How I Met Your Mother

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