Ted clearly didn't believe Robin that the hot girl is on a date, because he asks Barney how much buying the dibs will cost. Barney suggests $250,000, but Ted gives him twenty bucks. Just as Ted is heading over to talk to her, Cindy walks in (it's almost like she's our recapper, stalking me in my first episode as your official recapper) and gives the girl a hug. Ted shrinks back to the booth because of how it all ended badly with Cindy. Robin suggests Ted better move on, but he's remembering the roommate whose ankles he fell in love with. He wonders if this is her, but she's wearing hideous boots so he can't recognize the ankles.
Over at a table along the wall, Marshall's reminding Lily of their plan with the candles and banjos, but she's hung up on who he told. She asks if he told anyone at work, which flashes us sideways to his entire office cheering and playing him out with music, and even a sign telling him to get her pregnant. He says he might have mentioned it, but he had to tell his dad. She's not okay with that, since he's too involved anyway and calls constantly. Flash to myriad phone calls between Mr. Eriksen and Lily: changing her last name for her since she didn't do it, giving advice on dealing with a fight, telling her to put pickles on her sandwich. Lily can't procreate under these conditions, and insists Marshall call and tell his dad they're not having a baby. She's wearing her cute, tight, boob shirt, so he can't even think straight, what with the no sex or masturbation for two weeks.
Ted's hot girl is talking to a guy now, whom Robin thinks is cheesy, which makes her want something cheesy. Barney tells Robin she's jealous that the hot girl has it and Robin's lost it. Robin disagrees, insisting she could find it. Barney compares her to a carton of milk that's expired, so Robin leaves angrily. But she takes her junk food, of course. Back with Marshall and Lily, she says they can't tell her dad about the baby until there's a baby. Marshall wonders how his dad is going to give his boss notice for three months off work. She's like, "Uh, what?" He informs her that his mom and dad are coming to stay with them for three months when the baby's born. "We talked about this." She says they did NOT, and he says, "Me and my dad talked about this." She tells him to have a baby with his dad, to which he replies, "Why don't you have a baby with your butt?" Lily: "What?" Marshall: "I can't think straight. Why do you have to wear that shirt?! This is not how I thought this night was going to go!" As he storms out and everyone turns, Cindy spots Ted trying to hide in his booth.