The Apartment: Barney and Robin wake, and Barney apologizes if he went too far last night. Robin reminds him that unless she uses the safety word, flugelhorn, they're good. When she goes to leave her room, the doorknob breaks off in her hand. They're locked in. Robin asks Barney if he did this. Barney says, "No." Robin says, "Flugelhorn. Did you do this?" Barney denies it, still. Lily's outside the room and will only release them once they have "the talk." When Robin threatens that maybe they'll spend the whole day having sex, Lily tells them she brought Marshall with her, so maybe they'll do the same.

Columbia: Ted still doesn't know if he wants to be authoritative, or cool with his class, so he waffles from one to the other in a heartbeat. "This is Architecture 101. I am Professor Mosby. But you can call me Ted. Professor Mosby. T-Dawg. Do not call me T-Dawg." Oh, how can I resist? The same girl who, in his dream, asked T-Dawg who the hell he thought he was, raises her hand. A vision of Barney appears to her left. He's seated Indian style (can you still say that? At my kids' school, they say "criss-cross applesauce" but that I just can't) on a puff of purple smoke and reminds T-Dawg never to take questions on the first day because it shows weakness. He then points to the student's breasts and says, "Also, don't look here." He laughs, wishes T-Dawg good luck and then says, "Bye-sies." Yeah, that's what I said. With a snap of his fingers he's gone. The student still has her hand raised. T-Dawg knows he has to decide what kind of professor he's going to be, and asks the students to save all questions until the end of the lecture. The writers then tease us because allegedly the mother is somewhere in the classroom (and isn't the girl with the raised hand), but I'm not playing that game anymore. If and when it happens, it happens. Until then, I'm ignoring it. Saget!Ted then narrates that if he had taken the student's question, he would have found out he was in the wrong classroom. This stuff with Ted hits my cringe-o-meter hard, so don't expect a lot of details.

The Apartment: Robin and Barney slip a note under the door to Lily and Marshall. Marshall reads it to Lily, "We're just hanging out." Lily mulls this over then says, "Not good enough." Marshall's holding Ted's bullwhip. He echoes Lily and then lashes the door. We cut to Ted's classroom, where he's asking what the class is all about. A student replies, "Economics," and Ted tries to affirm his answer by tying architecture into being economical with the use of space. Then adds, "So, well done. Looks like someone's building towards an A huh?" Shudder. Back at the apartment, Robin and Barney slide another note under the door that states they're seeing where things are going. Lily tells them things aren't going out of that bedroom and declares their answer not good enough, again. Marshall bellows, "Not good enough," and whips the door once more. I hope they had Alyson Hannigan behind a piece of plexiglass or something, because I jump every time Marshall cracks that whip. Back in the class, there's more embarrassment. I... I just can't do it. Back at the apartment, Marshall retrieves the latest note. "We're Barn-man and Robin." Marshall and I laugh, but not Ms. Lily. Not good enough! Crack! In the classroom, Ted tells anyone in the class who has the slightest inclination to be anything other than an architect that they should leave, now. So they all get up to leave. As he tries to stop them, another professor enters the room, apologizes for being late, and says, "This is Economics 305, you may return to your seats." Ted *still* doesn't get it until the professor lays the smack-down and one of the students says, "T-Dawg, you're in the wrong room, bro." The class laughs, and Ted dies inside. We cut to...