Robin and Don: Over a montage of their moments together, Saget!Ted tells us the couple has become a great team both on and off the air -- because this is the season of tell, don't show. I guess this next bit is "showing" but they missed the window on this couple for me. Whatever. Robin and Don are guest puppeteers on local channel 12's children's show Monty & Moo-Moo. And their puppet-characters are supposed to be delivering an anti-drug message to the kids watching at home, so Robin has her puppet go off on a tangent about how chemical drugs are bad, but "things that grow...in nature...are okay to try like once, or twice." Ugh. Fast-forward. Once the puppet show is over, Don gives Robin a warm kiss. "Before I met you, I'd given up on everything: relationships, career, pants. You made me want to try again. I love you for that." When they make their puppets start smooching, the camera mercifully cuts to..
City Street: Marshall sees Cabbie Barney in the wild and introduces himself. Of course, he's not Cabbie Barney at all, just the same old, same old (and still, perhaps, the universe's call for castration).
Meanwhile, back at Don's, Robin's fielding a mysterious phone call, and promises the caller an answer by tomorrow. She hangs up and calls Don right away, because whatever it is, it's big. NO WAIT. She calls Ted, because even the show forgets that Don is supposed to be important. "Ted, something big has just happened, and you're the most sensible person I know. I need to talk to you right now. We cut to the...
Hair Salon: Ted's in full foil, and a pink cape, because he's getting blondified. Robin second-guesses her earlier "sensible" assessment and tries to back out of the convo, but Ted insists. She's gotten a call from a station offering her their lead anchor job, starting next week. Just as Robin's about to tell Ted the problem with this otherwise welcome news, the stylist comes over, lowers the dryer helmet over Ted's head and starts it up. Ted: "HELEN! Kill the dryer." Heh. The problem with this dream job is that it is in Chicago. We'll leave Ted's mouth agape as we go to commercial.
Barney's Cab: He's no longer wearing the brunette wig, but he's still got his fake sideburns on. Marshall's in back, wondering how Barney can be his own doppelganger, since Marshall called him at the GNB office the other day, while he was still looking at Cabbie-Barney. It was all a recording. Barney set it up to make his colleagues think he is "busting [his] hump, when he's really out humping busty chicks." Marshall says it couldn't have been a recording. "You called me 'Big Chief' -- my special workplace nickname." Barney oozes pity as he looks at Marshall in the rearview mirror. "Oh, buddy." Marshall's aghast. Barney tries to soothe his widdle feewings, but Marshall tells him, "Don't. Just don't." And you there, wondering why we saw Barney in his office when Marshall called him? Don't. Just don't.