MacLaren's: Barney, holding an urn full of his suit's remains, tells the gang about the life-saving transplant. Robin hopes this will end Barney's ridiculous quest for the hottie bartender, but how can Barney let his dearly departed suit down? He can't. He shan't! He kisses the top of the urn and heads up to the bar. Ted looks around at his friends. "He's absolutely right." Lily tries to snap Ted back to reality -- to no avail. "What if Cindy is the woman I'm supposed to marry and I'm just giving up? So long, elegant yet welcoming home in Westchester -- with a sensible mortgage I can handle without dipping into my savings." Yeah, babe, good luck with that. Ted's not listening to me. "Bye bye, two kids I raised with a stern yet loving hand -- finding the perfect balance between father and friend." Ditto. "Adios, triplet schnauzers Frank, Lloyd and Wright. Marshall, Lily and Robin have had enough and yell out, "Ted," simultaneously. Ted's point is: "I'm not giving up, either." He rises dramatically from the booth, walks to the bar, kisses Barney's urn, wonders aloud why he just did that and prances away like a magnificent poof .
At the bar, Karina takes note of the urn Barney's got with him, because...he's got a freaking urn with him. At a bar. She offers her condolences on the loss of his friend and decides he can't be alone tonight, so she ends her shift early. As she walks out from behind the bar (and thus, is out of earshot), a tearful Barney considers the urn in his hands. "Thank you old friend. You're going out with a bang."
Meanwhile, at the booth, Lily's still haranguing Marshall about Karina's hotness, but he stands his ground until Lily confesses that Karina made a few cameos in her mind the night before. The worm turns. Marshall's voice breaks. "Whoa, whoa, whoa...do you think she's hotter than me?" Lily's cornered, so she takes the pedant's way out. "I never said that." Marshall insists she compare Karina to Marshall when he was in his prime. Lily can't front to save her life (or marriage). Robin tries to stop their bickering (and the implication that Karina is hotter) by explaining that being behind the bar adds to the illusion of hotness. She takes off her jacket, walks behind the bar, and has her own little "Cherry Pie" montage. Back at the booth, Lily once again remembers that a woman's sexuality is a moving target, and Marshall realizes he's got more competition for his wife's affections than he'd imagined. Eventually, Carl comes out, ruins Robin's moment, and kicks her out from behind the bar, despite her pathetic pleas. Back on the civilian side of the room, Robin can't contain herself. "I was somebody back there!" A beat. "Everybody loved me."
A Rainy Night; Manhattan Streets: Yellow umbrella overhead, Ted races to Cindy's apartment. She lets him in, but (insecurely) says that since her roomie is in the shower, they can talk in her (Cindy's) room. Ted leaves the yellow umbrella by the door and follows her. Behind closed doors, he tells her that although the university rule book says they can't date, "It also says 'Don't teach drunk' and I do that all the time." Heh. He tells her he likes her; she's sweet, funny and hot. "This sounds crazy, but I feel like our paths are supposed to cross somehow, and I don't want to miss out on knowing you."
When Cindy says she doesn't want to miss out on knowing Ted either, he has to screw the pooch by talking some more. He tells her that looking around her room, he can tell they have a ton in common. For example, he thought he was the only person in the world who owned The Unicorns' Who Will Cut Our Hair When We're Gone? CD. Cindy says it's not her CD; it belongs to her roommate. And the book, World's End by TC Boyle? Roomie gave it to Cindy for her birthday and she hasn't yet cracked the cover. The bass guitar lying across the room (Ted's ideal woman plays one)? It's the roomie's too. Cindy: "She's in a band." Ted (under his breath): "Damn! That's cool." Cindy's discouraged. Ted just picked out the only three things in her room that belong to Roomie. Ted has moved on. "So, does your roommate's band ever plays shows, or..." Cindy points him toward the door. "Get out." Ted complies. Sit Ubu, sit. Good dog. As Ted makes his way out of the apartment, Saget!Ted starts narrating again, telling the kids that wasn't the night he met their mother. But right behind current Ted, we get the quickest glance of a woman wearing a towel turban, and a towel around her body, returning to the bathroom (or her bedroom). Saget!Ted says, "Although I think I glimpsed her foot." Imagine how
we the kids feel, Saget!Ted. Rip off the fricking bandage already, will ya? He continues: "But I did get a little closer to meeting the woman of my dreams. And your mom? Well she got her yellow umbrella back." As Ted closes the door behind him, we see the umbrella sitting in the corner, right where he left it.
Barney's Bedroom: He and Karina enter drinking wine, as Barney continues the fairy tale about his dearly departed friend. Karina promises to make him feel all better right after she freshens up, but she opens the closet door by mistake and sees all his suits in their climate controlled, optimally lit haven. Because this is a sitcom, Barney claims he's just suit-sitting for a friend. Because this is HIMYM, Karina doesn't buy it. She gives him an ultimatum -- her or the suits. And thus begins our...
Musical Extravaganza: While considering his options, Barney drifts off into fantasy land and his big musical number, "Nothing Suits Me Like a Suit." Look, it's on Youtube and I can't do it justice. To score a ten would be just fine, but I'd rather be dressed to the nines. It's a truth you can refute. Nothing suits me like a suit. Suffice it to say Neil Patrick Harris and a cast of tens (and a winged cartoon version of the late, great suit) dances and sings their way through the streets of New York. Ted, Robin, Marshall and Lily are even besuited and singing their hearts out. And Alyson Hannigan doesn't sing, "I think this line's mostly filler," even once, even though she may or may not have a whole problem with opera. But Barney most certainly gets the mustard out in the big finish. So I said all along I was giving this episode an A, right? (Sigh. I know, I'm easy.) I'm sorry suits, let's make amends. My Sunday best are my best friends. Let's send casual Friday down the laundry chute. Nothing suits me like a suit. Suffice it to say, until the very end of the fantasy, Barney's sure he'll give up his suits for no woman. But then again, this is Barney we're talking about, and Karina really is smoking hot. So he does what we knew he'd do a half hour ago, and lies. "I choose you, baby." He swears he'll most certainly give