After the break, Barney realizes that Tiffany and Co. are pharmaceutical sales reps. He tells Ted that it is the current cutting-edge profession to which hot girls are flocking. "Hot Pharma-Girl" was funny seven and a half years ago, when Heather Locklear played one on on Scrubs. But anyhow, Barney then gives Ted an abridged history of Hot Girl Jobs, starting 2.5 million years ago. Cutting-Edge Gatherer Girl (Underwood) approaches Hunter Barney. He grunts, "Homo Erectus," to her, and then turns to the camera with wink (and an audible twink). Next, Barney tells Ted, "As man mastered technology, the hottest profession of the day evolved." Sexy Nurse Underwood approaches the hospital bed of Wounded Soldier Barney. He says, "I'm pretty sure it's a hernia." He lifts his covers to give her an NC-17 peek. "Can you check again?" She gives him a Marilyn Monroe-esque smile and shrug. Barney twinks. "And then man took to the skies." Next, Mad Men Barney is a plane passenger. "And so hot women put on high heels and became stewardesses." Flight Attendant Underwood brings Mad Men Barney a martini. He says, "I am in the upright and locked position." She brings her hand to her chest as she laughs. Barney twinks before he drinks. Back in the bar, current-day Barney tells Ted: "And then man said, 'Life is hard. I should start taking lots of prescription drugs,' and so hot girls rolled into doctor's offices, looking sexy enough to render the very erection pills they peddle ironically redundant." So now, Pharma-Girls are today's hottest profession."

Tiffany saunters over to the booth, boops Ted on the nose and calls him Big Brown Eyes. In her presence, he has about as much couth as 1994 Marshall. When she reveals she still hasn't ditched her boyfriend, all Ted can think about is that she touched his nose. Once she struts off, Barney tells Ted he must ditch her and join him in the Pharma-Girl free-for-all. "Side effects may include loss of clothing; rug burn; shortness of breath; and sore abdominals the next morning...what in the WORLD is up?" He raises his hand but Ted leaves him hanging as we cut to...