Lily and Robin enter at exactly the wrong moment. Marshall tells Lily he has exciting news. Watching the porno, she says she hopes it's not that he won some sort of race. Wow! Quite randy for this early prime time hour! CBS, you filthy whore! Marshall tells her he got the job. Hugs for Marshall. Barney can't stop talking about the porno he found. They settle in to watch. Smiling, Robin says, "Is that him, 'cuz that Ted Mosby really knows what he's doing!" Ouch! Ted is hurt. Robin tries to change the inflection. That doesn't help, so she congratulates Marshall again. Lily asks Marshall if he's still going to do his other interview. SagetTed explains, over scary shots of an imposing corporate building, that Marshall was supposed to interview with a firm called Nicholson, Hewitt and West. They represent evil people, all the folks he'd be suing at the NRDC. Marshall wants to cancel. Lily says Marshall's dad went to a lot of trouble to set up the interview. "You can't just pull out at the last second!" Lily says. Robin, referring to the porno, says that apparently you can. Wonk, wonk, wonk. Let's hear it for the cheap jokes. They can't all be slap bets. Marshall IDs the navigator by his three stripes. It's Ted Mosby, porn star! Everybody claps then is taken aback by something revealed. Robin says she knows what kind of plane this is: "It's a boooiiing!" No fair giving Robin all the dirty lines. Barney says this is way better than Marshall's internship. Marshall insists it's a real job. Barney doesn't believe it. Ted wants to know who this guy is and whether they're related. He asks if they look alike. He's asked to make a porn face. There does seem to be a resemblance, apparently.
Ba ba pa pa! (Etcetera...)
MacLaren's. Ted, Barney, Robin, and Lily are at the booth. Wendy the waitress gives Ted a bottled water in case "Ted Mosby" gets dehydrated. Ted goes, "Ha ha" and says that now they know she watches porn. Ted wonders if Porno Ted is getting famous. Barney, surfing on his iPhone, has discovered that Porno Ted has been in the business for three months and has been in 125 movies. He's a hard worker. Get it? Because he's hard! Ha! I'm so clever! Yes... talking about his penis! It's erect! Let's move on... Robin asks if this guy is Jude Law. Painful explanation of why that joke would have worked two years ago when Jude Law was in a lot of movies. Ted finally shushes Robin to let it go. Barney finds an interview that Porno Ted did with Adult Video Weekly. Ted says, "Oh God!" Side-whoosh to his memory of a phone call he got at the apartment. Someone from "AVW" wanted to interview him. Ted holds the phone and tells Lily and Marshall it's someone from Architecture Vision Weekly. Interestingly, the week they featured the Sears Tower, it looked very similar to that week's cover of Adult Video Weekly. Ted tells the guy on the phone that he's been reading the magazine since he was a little kid. "Whoah, that's a bummer," the interviewer says. He asks about Ted's latest "project." Ted says he'll be working with at least three partners. "Group scene. Always fun," the interviewer says. Ted says they're gonna ride him pretty hard, but they're great guys. "Guys? Whoah. There's a scoop!" the interviewer says. The jokes just write themselves! Side-whoosh back to MacLaren's where Ted says grimly, "That interview went on for another 20 minutes." Lily reads a quote about Ted being exhausted, bent over a table. Big laughs.