On the street, Barney is still running. He urges Ted not to go into the light.
Ted has a visitor. It's Stella. Is it enough of a shock that we should go to commercial without another laugh? The people behind this episode seem to think so. After the commercials, everyone leaves the room to give them some privacy. Ted starts with, "I love you." She says she loves him, too. He asks if they can forget about what happened earlier and she says it's forgotten before he can even finish his sentence. She looks at his chart and everything looks to be all right. "I think you can handle it," she says. "Handle what?" he asks. She mounts him right on the hospital bed and they start kissing. Yow! Robin, Lily and Marshall all go, "Awwww." Marshall thinks it's a miracle that they went from breaking up to dry-humping. Robin says sarcastically that the Vatican would probably tell him that most of their certified miracles also involve dry humping. Sacrilegious!
"April 2008, Lily's kindergarten classroom!" Marshall tries. Marshall is telling Lily that he's going to go bed for his old job back. He says the job market is tough. He tries to get the classroom of kids behind him, but as Lily points out, they'll cheer for anything if you say it the right way. She gets the kids to cheer for a devastating oil spill off the coast of Alaska. We cut to Marshall, wearing a business suit, and meeting with one of his old bosses. (Sadly, it's not Bob Odenkirk.) We cut back and forth between the classroom and the law office. This really feels like a plot that could have been in a whole different episode. It's post-strike, end-of-the-season cramming time, I guess. While Lily goes to grab some glue from another room, she asks Marshall to watch the class. Marshall uses this as an opportunity to play "Tiny hat on a huge man." As he entertains the kids with his various hats, we see him also grovel for his job at the law firm, saying he made a huge mistake. In the classroom, he tries on a small Pilgrim's hat and says it's not small: he just has an abnormally large head. You know I love Marshall, right? This scene still goes on way too long in an already too-short episode. Marshall does Abe Lincoln next, as Future Law Office Marshall is scratching his head. The kids are much more entertained by the tiny hats and Marshall's booming voice than I am. In the law office, Marshall realizes that all the head scratching is because he got lice from the tiny hats. That's too bad, because his boss was going to give him a second chance. "Those little bastards gave me lice!" Marshall thinks to himself. He tries not to scratch, but of course, that just makes it worse. He squirms as his old boss talks and talks. Marshall tries to rub his head with the chair. He drops a pen so he can scratch his head on the corner of the desk. Marshall keeps trying to keep his cool, but of course he can't. "I HAVE LICE!" he finally screams. The boss yells at Marshall to get out. Over an intercom, he orders an evacuation of the building. Marshall tells Robin that if it wasn't for the lice, he would have gotten his job back and two weeks later when the SEC came knockin' (we see a clip of two of the bosses being taken out by police), Marshall would have been in trouble, too. It's a miracle. Get it? Stella emerges from the hospital room. Lily hugs her and says she's so glad they're back together. Stella asks what she means by that. Stella says it was a small fight, not a breakup. She figures out that Ted thought it as a breakup. "Son of a bitch!" she says. She goes back into the room and knocks the Jell-O out of Ted's hand. She asks if that was a breakup. Ted thought it was clear that it was. She didn't know. She meant, "We're good" like you'd say it to a waiter when you're fine. Ted tells her to forget about all that. After the accident, he's happy with her and doesn't want to break up. "But you did," she reminds him. She thinks he's going to have those feelings again and keep breaking up with her. She can't count on a car accident every time Ted has doubts. She tells Ted he can have his breakup. "We're good," she tells him, in a very different tone this time. Ted looks around, shell-shocked.