How I Met Your Mother

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Cindy McLennan: C | Grade It Now!
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Möbius Knicker Twist

MacLaren's: Robin tells Ted that all this nonsense with PYTPJ is just "to procrastinate from actually calling clients." Ted says he's not procrastinating; he just wants everything to be perfect. My cousin George calls himself a "procrastinating perfectionist." It suits me, too. I was talking to my mom and mentioned that my husband and I are going to get our taxes done today (April 15), and she laughed and told me George was, too. But in our defense, if the world had ended anywhere between the end of January and yesterday, my husband and I would not have wanted to waste time at the accountant's, and I'm sure George and his wife feel the same. Which is my long way of saying, Oh, Ted -- the fact that you're a perfectionist doesn't mean you're not procrastinating. It's likely proof that you are. Anyhow, Robin points out that PYTPJ is not helping. Barney strongly disagrees. "Hey. Hey! If Ted says that PJ..." Barney winks "...is important to the company, then PJ..." he winks again, "...is not going anywhere." Ted adds, "See? He's very valuable."

Upon realizing PJ is male, not female, Barney completely reverses his position. "PJ's not some hot chick you're banging?" Ted says no and that he's mentoring him. Barney cringes and groans. "Mentoring. I mentored a young fellow once, even made him my wingman. Then one day, he hired an assistant to work ten feet from his bedroom who -- get this -- isn't a hot chick, proving he never listened to a word I said. And do you know that young man's name?" Ted offers, "Ted Mosby?" Barney frowns. "Maybe. I don't remember. Because HE IS DEAD TO ME!" Barney slams down his drink and walks away from the booth, then turns back and lays his hand on the table. "PJ's gonna be getting a very confusing card in the mail, along with a garment that he should by no means wear for three days and then mail back to me." Three days? Gross. I mean, the whole idea is gross, but three days of stank is just too too. Thankfully, we sideways slide to...

GNB: Marshall runs a few of his That Guy ideas by Barney. He proposes "Eco-guy, because everybody loves a guy who recycles, right?" Marshall doesn't get out much, does he? Barney tells him that will get him fired. Next, he proposes being Wacky Tie Guy. Barney says, "Fired." Daily Fun Fact Guy. Barney waves his finger in the air. "Did you know... that you're fired?" I Know-A-Good-Stretch-For-That Guy. "Downward-facing fired." Monty Python Guy. "We are the knights who say... 'You're fired'." I suspect that Monty Python Guy would be crowned King at the TWoP home office, at least until Looks Just Like Jensen Ackles Guy staged a coup. [Sorry, but Looks Just Like Jemaine Clement Guy is the current Emperor-for-Life. - Z]

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How I Met Your Mother

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