Ted walks in, and thank goodness, because even the Canada jokes can't save this episode for me this week. He tells the gang that Bilson fired him. Lily asks if this means he'll get laid off. Ted says he quit his firm, because he's realized he can't work for heartless corporate clients. Living out Marshall and Barney's big lie reminded him how much he loves his work when he's not answering to the "Bilsons of the world." Barney is not fooled. "They fired you, didn't they?" Ted says they did, but he got a good severance package and has made a big decision -- he's going to start his own firm. Everyone congratulates him, while Barney (bless him) says, "In this economy?" It turns out Ted's not mad at his friends for completely screwing with his life. He's grateful. I'm so annoyed at his lack of stones that it's a struggle for me to type this. Barney asks how it went down between Ted and Bilson, and Ted tells the story in the corporate buzz speak which I didn't transcribe earlier, because I'm so mad at the show. I'll lay it out here, though, because I'm not mad at you, gentle readers. Ted says, "Well, after he proposed a vocational paradigm shift, I made an impromptu presentation using a four-pronged approach that really brought him to his knees." Barney says, "Hit him with a chair?" Ted confirms and Barney says, "That's my boy." Look, Show, it's going to take more than buttering me up with NPH's flawless delivery. That's right. You'd better go to commercial.
End Tag: Robin's in British Columbia, circa 2002, paying rapt attention to The Frozen Snowshoe, as he shows her his Harvey's trays. "And this one, I got on the drive from Milverton to Wawa." Robin's star struck. "That's pretty impressive, The Frozen Snowshoe." He tells her to call him "Shoe," because they're friends, and invites her to sit down with him. Robin says, "So, Shoe..." and my TV TURNS INTO THE BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON? WHERE'S THE SHOW? OH NO, NOW IT'S BLACK. NOW IT'S BLUE AGAIN! DON'T DO ME LIKE THIS! IS MY TV DEAD? WHAT WILL I DO?
Ahem. Apparently, this problem happened all over Boston, and my TV is just fine, thank goodness, because I really can't stand to miss Lost. I couldn't get the episode to play on the CBS website, but didn't want to leave you all in the lurch, so I found a transcript. Assuming it's correct. [You're good. - Z] Here's how it went down while my TV was blue. Ms. Robin Sherbatsky pulls a bottle of maple syrup out of her purse and says, "How would you like to give me an Old King Clancy?" Shoe looks at her in disbelief, then says, "I think you should go." Robin embarrassedly puts the bottle of maple syrup back in her purse, and we fade to black.