While 1:45 AM is the start of the workday for Robin, it's nearly last call for her mates at MacLaren's. She's hoping for news and gossip, but all they've got is the same old same old: Lily's students ate paste; Marshall forgot his pants at work; and Barney used deceit to hook up with an airhead. Oh and… Ted's college-era ex moved to town!
Lily tells Robin that Karen was a douche, and Marshall one-ups her. "She was heiress to the Massingill fortune." Whatever. She turned Ted into one of her douche-zombies. Lily warns Ted he's never allowed to get back with her. Marshall can't even stand the thought of Ted calling her to join them for drinks. Ted and Karen were always off an on. They'd be fine together -- douching it up, then she'd cheat on him (usually in his bed), he catch her, the guy would say, "Sorry, bro," and then Karen and Ted would break up. Ted would get depressed; Lily and Marshall would wait the appropriate amount of time to tell him they hated her; and then he'd get back together with her. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
When the gang makes it perfectly clear Ted shouldn't even call Karen, he admits he's already had lunch with her. They had a great time, laughing at what pretentious asses they were back then ("were" ahem). And then? They kiss! In the restaurant. Lily and Marshall are furious so Ted tries to distract them with the details of Marshall's pants story, but Lily won't be swayed and gets Ted to admit he took Karen back to his place. Trying to get Lily to chill, Ted says, "It was just that night. And the next three after that. And one morning." And this time, Ted wasn't the cuckold, but Karen's meathead hook-up who got to say, "Sorry, bro." That is, Karen was cheating with him! Ted again brings up the pants story. Marshall tries to deflect, but Barney's been aching for it to be told, so they finish it. After shooting hoops at the GNB gym, Marshall realizes he doesn't have his pants and sprints to the office in his suit coat, shirt, tie and boxers. Lily brings him pants, but because she's in a hurry, she hands them off to Barney, who agrees to deliver them to Marshall. And he does. After shredding them like he's Edward Scissorhands, which sets up Bilson and the other guys in the meeting to ridicule Marshall mercilessly. Barney's the only one who finds the whole pants story funny, and laughs so hard he falls out of his booth.
Back to Ted and Karen: In a flashback, we see Ted call out Karen for having a boyfriend. She says they've been drifting and she's been meaning to break up with him, but she's unable to tell people how she really feels. Ted gets that; and he claims he has the same problem, so he decides to start now, by telling Karen she's a hurtful, reckless person and he doesn't want to see her again. She tries to finagle his douchay au revoir into a promise that they'll meet again, but Ted can only say, "Sorry, bro." And he leaves. Hooray, Ted! He says it was good for Karen, too. Later that night, she had the uncomfortable break-up conversation with Jerry. Lily realizes that if Ted knows this, he talked to Karen yet again. Ted speedily confesses that once she broke up with Jerry, Karen called him, they hooked up, and they've been dating ever since, and he totally knows it's going to be different this time. And? She walks into the bar. Lily and Marshall are about as thrilled as the fandom. Ba pa ba pa ba pa ba pa ba dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah.
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Want more? The full recap starts right below!
"Sorry Bro" represents, I think, much of what makes this show different from so many sitcoms. It sails right over the choppy wake of last week's "The Stinsons" and right back into the center of my TV-loving heart, weaving a beautiful pattern throughout the story, one that sometimes doesn't stand out, until you get some distance from it. Well done, Show. Let's get to it, shall we?
Saget!Ted invites us in, narrating over shots of Robin at the Come On GET UP New York! anchor desk: "Back in 2009, your Aunt Robin got a job hosting a morning show, which meant she had to get up kind of early. How early?" The screen fades to black and a title card appears which reads: "1:45 AM." Oh, my. Since you don't actually exist, I can be completely rude: Are you sure you don't want to have a baby, Robin? Sure, the hours aren't any better at first, but they do improve, plus? You can keep your jammies on. Or off, for that matter. The baby doesn't care, as long you're not stingy with the dry diapers and the warm boobies.
Robin graciously ignores my meddling as she carries her morning coffee into the bar at the aforementioned 1:45 AM. She's bright as a penny and ready for work and a whole new day, while her friends are still washing the dregs of the last day off them, with copious amounts of MacLaren's booze. And while I get Barney being there, just because he's him, it seems a little strange that an architect, a lawyer, and a kindergarten teacher -- all of who are 30-ish -- are still at a bar at this time of the morning, on a weekday. But I was a mother at 28, so what do I know? No, I do not have an agenda. I'm just sayin'... Robin's friends tease her about the potential audience for a 4:00 AM show: people who getting up to host shows at 5:00 AM; meth addicts who haven't yet sold their TVs; strippers in that messy grey area between getting off work and getting their kids up for school; recappers who love the rush of staring a deadline straight in the eye. Robin takes it in stride, saying, "Them's my peeps." What up, Robin?
What she really wants is to find out what she's been missing since her latest schedule change. Marshall says, "Just the usesh..." (as in usual -- I don't know how to spell that). But Barney won't let it go at that. "Robin, think of the funniest thing that has ever happened... Now double that." Robin says, "So a chimpanzee wearing two tuxedos?" What is it about the monkeys, or -- well, I guess chimpanzees are apes, not monkeys, and I'm not inclined to piss one off as of late -- but why do we laugh at them so? Anyhow, Barney tells Robin, "Something even funnier than that happened to Marshall today." Marshall says that there's nothing funnier than the chimp in a tux, and his is just not that good of a story. Robin's unconvinced. She wants the dish from her friends, and she wants it now. Lily tells her that some weeks are like that -- the same old, same old. A kid in her class ate paste, and Barney deceived a less-than-brilliant girl into bed. Ted fakes a blasé face: "My ex-girlfriend Karen moved to town. It's just -- it's all the same, Robin."
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