How I Met Your Mother

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Cindy McLennan: A- | Grade It Now!
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Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad

The goat has a cameo in a flash-forward, and naked Neil Patrick Harris makes the night, as we learn Super Canadian is no match for "The Naked Man." If they'd managed to refer to "Slapsgiving" in this wonderfully silly episode, it would have gotten an A+.

Saget!Ted opens the episode by telling his kids (who make an appearance) that everyone has theories about break-up recovery time. Lily says it takes half the length of the relationship. Marshall says to give it a week for every month you were together. Going by either of those theories, should Ted even remember Stella? Robin's theory is less flexible: "Exactly 10,000 drinks, however long that takes." Does that allow for any detox periods in between? Barney's more philosophical. "You can't measure something like this in time. There's a series of steps... from her bed to the front door. Bam! Out of there! Nexxxxxt!" Saget!Ted thinks you start to recover when you meet the person who gets you back in the game -- so tonight's episode is less How I Met Your Mother, and more How I Met the Person Who Got Me Back in the Game So That I Could Meet Your Mother Eventually, Unless You Were Hatched; I Really Don't Remember Anymore, Go Clean Your Room. Or, How Ted Got His Groove Back...

And so, current-day Ted meets a pretty woman named Vicky (how many does that make?) on the elevator at work. They catch one another's eyes from the start. Saget!Ted lectures that you don't jump into these things; you dip a toe in. Each day, they dress a little more nicely (or in Vicky's case, more revealingly, and in Ted's case, less like it's been three weeks since he did laundry). Saget!Ted notes that eventually, you're ready to wade in -- slowly. Of course Saget!Ted knows that, because current day Ted learned it for him, the hard way. His first real words to Vicky are a confession that he was left at the altar a month prior, which Saget!Ted sums up as a "cannonball." Current day Ted says, "It was a complete disaster. Ever since then I haven't even been able to look at another woman -- except for the old lady on the subway who break-dances for nickels. I -- I don't look at her that way; I just look at her as an old lady -- break-dancing. And she is good. I'm going to give her a dollar next time." Vicky stares at the elevator ceiling, as she thinks, "Great choice, Vicky. You just had to wear your brown camisole to work for elevator guy's benefit. Couldn't even wear a blazer? Oh, no. Now Creed Bratton's going to be leering at you all day, and the other women in the office will hate you more than they already do, meanwhile elevator guy is a Tuh-rain Wreck!" Ted seems to read her mind, so he starts over. "Hey, let's pretend I just said this: 'These elevator rides have been the highlight of my week, and I'd love to see you again, Friday night, not in the elevator, at a restaurant -- a nice one.' What do you say?" Vicky says, "Yes." She must be really nice, but not as nice as our...

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How I Met Your Mother

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