How I Met Your Mother

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: A+ | Grade It Now!
A Licky Boom Boom Down

MacLaren's: Jim, Ted and Barney all fight over who gets the first crack at the object. I think its name used to be Maggie. Jim mentions how small the object's window of opportunity is. Barney says, "Guys, let me assure you, if you let me in there, that window's gonna open up again in, like, ten minutes." Oh, too bad Marshall missed Barney dissing his own prowess like that. Robin approaches the guys as they notice the object is missing. When Ted says, "Wait, where's Maggie?" Robin says, "She gone." She sent her home because the guys were like vultures fighting over her, and she ought to be single for once. Jim sneers, "You jealous bitch." Barney starts to join in, but Ted stops them. Clearly, like me, he's wondering why Robin's face is dirty. I think she's being far too pedantic about the filthy girl thing, Ted. Oh wait, Ted still wants to talk about Maggie. To give him his due, he agrees with Robin. Maggie needs some time on her own. To take that due right back -- he's now out-Barneying Barney (and Jim). Ted backs up a little as he goes on about what the object probably needs, then throws an empty barstool in the other guys' path and books it out of the bar. Barney and Jim trip over the stool and each other, trying to catch up with him and the object's quickly closing window.

Manhattan Streets; Night: Ted runs past the object's door to fake out Barney and Jim, then doubles back and heads up the stairs. They're right behind him, though. Inside, Ted gets to the door first, while Barney and Jim tussle in front of Mrs. Douglas's place. Maggie comes to the door, just like a real person -- just like she did in all of Ted's flashbacks, and there's a guy behind her, just like there was in all of Ted's flashbacks. This one is Adam (Michael Spellman). He's the girl-next-door's boy next door. Literally. They were childhood sweethearts who grew up next to each other. Saget!Ted narrates: "And then, Maggie Wilkes told us the second greatest love story I've ever heard." We get a montage of wee-est Maggie and Adam having a little tea party, near a little sapling. He pats her bunny (which is wearing a matching outfit, and the whole thing makes me yearn for Pushing Daisies, as Invader Toph pointed out in the episode thread). Next they're playing catch; the sapling has a few years on it, now -- it's no longer supported by stakes. Soon, teenaged Maggie and a stone-washed overall-wearing Adam are sharing what must be their first kiss, so soft and sweet, underneath the shade of the now taller, fuller tree. And finally, a mover carrying a box passes them, as Adam places a necklace (the necklace) on Maggie's neck. He then picks up his oversized duffel bag and sadly walks away. Teen Maggie looks down at her necklace, and we fade out, back to...

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How I Met Your Mother




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