Barney gets a text from Ted: "We're combing up-sars." I think we would know if someone was combing up Sars. I would have gotten a memo or something. Marshall panics. Lily figures out that it's Ted coming upstairs. The three of them scramble. Outside the door, Ted drops his keys as the girls giggle. Inside, Lily, Marshall, and Barney scramble some more as Marshall tries to find his pants. Ted and the ladies enter. Trudy finds a photo of Marshall and Lily and asks about his roommates. Ted says they are definitely not here and that they have total privacy. "This is gonna be awesome!" Ted says as the girls park on the couch and laugh. Ted goes to his room to get his CD. He finds his three friends in the bedroom. "Noooo!" he whispers.
Ted tries to explain his predicament but Lily is way ahead of him. She high-fives him and congratulates him on his achievement. Marshall tries to score some dap, but Lily tells him not to be gross. Ted tells them to get out through the fire escape. Marshall says he saw a pigeon crap on it the other day and the whole thing shifted. That's too bad. Lily says Ted can use her bed. What an amazingly selfless person. Ted says he just needs the Wilco CD to seal the deal. Barney grabs it -- and snaps the CD in half. No! Everyone freaks out. Barney has a tantrum. He says the belt is his birthright. He says it would be like Jimmy Olsen capturing Lex Luthor while Clark sits in his bedroom, impotent. On Smallville, that's not so implausible. Marshall says that Barney has done way dirtier stuff. Barney says he's never ridden the tricycle. I find that hard to believe, especially since he once said he had a 10-way. I can't even imagine what that cycle looks like. Barney says it almost happened once and he was so close.
Side-whoosh to Barney sitting on the floor with two hot ladies. He spills a glass of red wine and one of the women freaks out about her brand new carpet. They tell Barney to get out. Back to Ted's room... Ted can't believe that Barney is going to trike-block him. He says it's petty. Tom Petty, even! Ted goes out to the living room to grab Lily when she goes to take a peek. He tells the ladies he's still looking for the CD. Lily recognizes Rachel from her shoe-sale fight. She was the "bitch" who was on her "list." Lily decides she can't give up her bedroom. Ted offers to throw in some spanking. He also offers to reimburse Lily full retail price for the boots. She gladly accepts. Well, that was pointless. Ted goes back out after adjusting his hair some more.