How I Met Your Mother
Twelve Horny Women

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admin: C | 2 USERS: F
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The Rippling Ab Effect

Oh, How I Met Your Mother, do you think I'll be so easily distracted by a shirtless Joe Manganiello and a reference to The Wire that I'll forgive this episode for being nearly entirely pointless? You are wrong. True Blood and the actual Wire can provide me those same things in much more satisfying ways.

Marshall's life-changing case lands him in front of the New York State Judiciary committee. Knowing what we know about Marshall, it is pretty safe to assume that he did something ridiculous during trial and landed himself in a pile of trouble. Surprisingly it turns out that he just really wants a judgeship so he himself can affect change for the little guy, instead of leaving that in the hands of a judge who is more worried about his Annie tickets and protecting big business.

Anyway, the bulk of the episode features Marshall trying to save the animals from the big bad pharmaceutical company that Brad (Manganiello) is defending. And all of his friends call out sick from work to watch him in action. But it seems like this is at least over the course of a couple days, and aren't most landmark trials like this very lengthy? At least that's what it seemed like in Erin Brockovich. How long did Barneys faux massive hemorrhoids last?

Brad may have stolen all of the plans from Marshall's office last week, but his strategy doesn't really seem to involve using that at all. Instead, he relies on the all-female jury and the bi-curious judge to fall for his sex appeal, as he spends about 20 minutes bent over and shaking his ass in the air to pick up a fallen pencil. Then he films a video of himself mostly shirtless in the polluted Frog Lake, clearly meant to tantalize. Marshall brings in a cute little duckling to make the women ooh and ahh, but he wins the case by showing that Brad's well-toned chest has been covered with the same rash that has been harming all the poor little animals. Too bad the judge only awards him a minor amount (though I thought that juries had a say in the settlements?) and Marshall's big victory turns out to be rather small.

On the upside, Brad realized that he doesn't like making money defending polluting creeps and instead would like to be poor and defend the small guy by working with Marshall. So the two go back to being brunch buddies -- we can't imagine how a perpetually horny Lily would handle that scenario. And Marshall, after cracking some inappropriate jokes, has to wait on the decision from the panel to find out if he'll get to be Judge Eriksen.

Also, during the course of the trial, we see Marshall and teenage Marvin sitting on the dock of a lake having a conversation about the ripple effect, and why Marshall fights for the little guy hoping to make a big difference in the future. Not all that notable, but I did mildly appreciate the dystopian future with the toxic lake and the Loch Ness-looking monster haunting their fishing spot.

In the RIDICULOUSLY stupid subplot, being in a courtroom makes Barney, Robin, Ted and Lily all reminisce about their lives as supposed teenage delinquents. They each stake their claim to being the most badass in the past, with Lily's flashbacks showing her walking around the neighborhood terrifying everyone with the whistling tunes of "Farmer in the Dell" playing in the background, all Omar Little style. And that got picked up later in the episode, when we find out she was the actual badass… though why we've never before seen kids scatter in fear at her mere presence is beyond me. Still, if the rest of this had been remotely as clever as that one quick pop culture reference, we might have had something, but instead we just got to see not really all that bad Robin Sparkles trashing a hotel room and then getting a trophy, while also finding out that Barney had very small hands as a child.

As for Barney and Robin, they act appropriately immature and awkward about their kiss, pretending that it never happened and that they are just awesome. Until Barney finally maturely sits her down and says he's done acting like an idiot and trying to woo her, so he's done. Now, given that we've seen their wedding day, this is obviously not the case, and even Robin has a quizzical look on her face at the end. So this is just more filler and padding leading up to the eventual wedding. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to be on Tumblr looking at gifs of Joe Mangianello in True Blood, trying to erase the memory of this episode from my mind.

How I Met Your Mother

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