Ted's Apartment; Right after documenting the whys: Dating Robin was a huge mistake. They didn't work as a couple. Barney will always love Robin, but other women and other boobs are important too. With boobs there's nuzzling, juggling and honka-honka. Barney: "I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic.... Then there's just a bunch of drawings of boobs." I am this-close to putting him in a big time out, again. Sigh.
Ted's Apartment; Present: Ted: "You get it now." Barney: "Yeah, I get it. I definitely want her back."
Dowisetrepla: Marshall and Lily continue to rationalize their separate beds. Marshall suggests a third bed, for sex. Lily: "Aw. Yes. A sex bed. A dirty, dirty sex bed." She's also considering "a beanbag for special birthday stuff." Marshall decides they just revolutionized modern marriage. They try to high five, but they're too far apart, so fingers guns must suffice. Maybe they should try text messaging.
Don's: Robin welcomes the gang. From the moment they get there, Barney is obnoxious. Ted tries to point out to Barney that he's just wanting what he can't have. But when Ted uses a chair as an analogy, Barney hops into it, and declares it all his. Later, when Don and Lily are discussing spicy food, Barney proceeds to eat a whole chili pepper. After he's done sputtering, he grabs three fingers full of wasabi. Marshall yells, "Awesome." Ted yells, "Get him some milk." Don goes to the fridge and finds an empty carton. As he shakes it he says, "Oh, we're out of milk, but thanks for the reminder, Robin." Everyone awwws -- everyone except Barney, who can no longer stand.
Meanwhile, Marshall notices that Don too has twin beds. When the Aldrin-Eriksens tell Don they just got twin beds, his response is less than enthusiastic, so Lily probes his reasons. Don: "My ex-wife and I thought it would be a good idea, but we just started to drift apart." Marshall: "Yeah, but I bet you didn't have another bed just for sex!" Don: "No. But she did -- at her personal trainer's house." Don declares that if Robin decides to move in, he's getting a king-sized bed.
Ted's Apartment: Ted tells Barney that he hopes he's happy. Barney stands by what he did. "It was bold and romantic." Ted: "You soiled yourself from both ends of your body." Barney -- drinking straight from a bottle of what looks like Jack Daniels -- reminds Ted that he's done plenty of stupid stuff to impress Robin. Ted says he used to, but he no longer does, "Because I am over her, just like you are." Barney: "You are not over her. You want her back just as much as I do. You just won't let yourself go there." Ted says that's ridiculous, but then, he digs out his post-Robin-breakup-letter from his "For My Biographer" box.