Ted apologizes to Blah Blah, who thinks Robin is trying to undermine her. Cut to Robin, who's clearly not plotting anything. Blah Blah says she wishes they had something romantic to share like Lily and Marshall. Ted hints that their story's not exactly what was told earlier. He doesn't want to say why because it's a secret. Blah Blah whispers something really dirty to Ted that he might get to do to her later. The Hot/Crazy Scale returns and Blah Blah's dot shoots straight up in the hot direction, all the way off the chart. Ted quickly tells the story of a party that happened the night before Lily and Marshall met.
Side-whoosh. 1996. Ted, bushy-haired and wearing glasses, eyes Lily. She makes a flirty face at him. Ted doesn't use the word "freshmen." Sexist. She's in Hewitt 220. He's in Hewitt 110. He tells her she should drop by. She says maybe she will. We see Marshall, being held upside down and chugging from a keg nozzle. Everyone applauds. Ted takes Lily's bear and offers her a glass of fine pinot noir. Lily says it's fruity. He cut it with cranberry juice because it was too strong. Lily asks if Ted has a girlfriend. He has a long-distance one. He quotes Descartes to justify playing the field. Lily, turned-on, kisses him. They mack down right in the middle of the room. Side-whoosh to the present. Ted explains that the next morning, Lily still remembered room 110 and came to look for him. She was looking for Ted. Ted says that he and Lily have never spoken of it. Blah Blah says he has to tell Marshall. She says if Ted doesn't, she will. He thinks she's joking. She gives Ted the crazy-eyes. "Oh no!" he says.
Blah Blah sits down and asks Lily immediately how she and Ted met. She asks for "The real story." Lily, nonplussed, says it was a long time ago.
Dorm room. Ted is on the phone with his long-distance girlfriend, crying and blubbering about Descartes and confessing his make-out session from the night before. Marshall and Lily come into the room. Ted tells the girlfriend that he loves her. Turns out he's just leaving a message. He says he's going to the computer lab to send her an "electronic mail." Hee. Marshall introduces Lily. "No! I'm sorry, but I love Karen!" Ted says as he storms out of the room.