GNB (the next morning): Marshall's having a nic-fit, so he decides to go up to the GNB roof to get some fresh Manhattan air. Of course, Arthur is there -- smoking -- and offers Marshall a cigarette. When Marshall declines, Arthur calls him Jeffrey and waxes nostalgic about the bond between smoking buddies. Marshall decides to take one of Arthur's butts after all, and suddenly, Arthur knows his name. Commercial.
Dowistrepla: Marshall arrives home. "Heyyyyyy!" Lily doesn't look at him -- doesn't even look up from her book. "You smoked." Marshall cops to it and that it was his third cigarette of the day. "You know what that means? I'm a smoker now. It's all over. I even bought a pack on the way home, and a lighter and a Vikings lamp -- which has nothing to do with anything, but I saw it in the window and I liked it." Lily rises to face him. "Damn it, Marshall! We already have four Vikings lamps! And smoking kills." He tells her about bonding with his boss. In the flashback, Arthur coos over pictures of his dog (and could not care less about pictures of his kids) and then unbuttons his shirt to reveal he's wearing a t-shirt that bears his dog's face. He makes Marshall pet it, right under shirt-dog's chin. Uncomfortable! Back at Dowistrepla, Lily doesn't care about Marshall's excuses. She makes him turn over his cigarettes and lighter, and then... sparks one up as she sinks back onto the sofa. "Ahhhhh. That's the stuff." In 2030, the kids again say, "WHAT?!" Saget!Ted explains that whenever Marshall fell off the wagon, Lily got dragged down with him. I don't know, Saget!Ted. I think she leapt. With joy.
Come On, GET UP New York! set: When Robin tries to book an interview with the mayor, Don condescends that she is adorable. He says the mayor won't appear on a show nobody watches and makes a colonoscopy joke I'm skipping. Robin tells Don he's just jealous because he never had a shot at a network job, but she thinks she does, so she has to focus on her work. Don says he's been on a network job and then launches into a morning anchor's equivalent of the Crash Davis speech from Bull Durham. No, not the kisses one -- the one about going to "The Show." The crew is amazed, but also discouraged. Don only lasted one Labor Day weekend at the network. "But the second you get used to it, they find someone who isn't 'going through a bitter divorce' or doesn't 'reek of gin'." (He makes air quotes back there.) Before you know it, you're stuck in a dead-end gig, surrounded by people who are going nowhere, doing the news in your tighty-whities. Robin waits a beat and then dead-pans: "Okay, the underwear thing was your choice, and I don't like that it's catching on." A couple of crew members pass by in their undies, to drive home a point nobody at my house wanted to learn.