Human Target
Pilot

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: B | Grade It Now!
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The Unsinkable Train

Tony rolls off Stephanie and shoots at the bald guy, who shoots back. Bang! Bang! You missed me! No ya didn't! Tony runs out and the bald guy chases him. Tony has a shot, but he's out of bullets! Now the bald guy has a shot, but he's out of bullets! Tony and Stephanie run! Bang! Bang! Tony and Stephanie take refuge after blocking the door to the next car. Stephanie is shocked to learn that Tony's wearing a bullet-proof vest, although that's mostly because she thinks it would have been a good idea to give her one of those. Tony wants her to use the intercom to tell people what's going on, but apparently it isn't hooked up yet. They look at the air duct above them. Seriously? An air duct?

Guerrero sits down in a café with two guys (not the two goons from before) and asks if they've heard anything about MacNamara Engineering. One of the guys, a white-haired older gentleman, blathers on about how Guerrero is "fighting the good fight" now, and it's fairly uninteresting. However, something about "brothers fighting brothers" gets Guerrero's attention.

Tony and Stephanie climb into the air duct, which is enormous. There's a grate between them and the next car, so Tony begins to unscrew it. Once through, it transpires that the bald guy has had the same idea, because he's also in the air duct. Air Duct Fight! It's pretty cramped, and they eventually fall out of it so they can wrestle in a room full of sparks and smoke. Fight fight fight, bite bite bite. Also a lot of choking. Finally, as Bald Guy is choking Tony, Tony kicks the window out, and the explosive decompression breaks the hold. Well, not "explosive" decompression, I guess, but now there's a lot of wind going on. Tony kicks the bald guy out the window, where he hits the wall of the tunnel and freezeframing reveals a big red splotch on the wall. Stephanie looks out of the air duct in shock.

Tony and Stephanie stroll into the car where all the people are. Tony fires his gun into the floor (seems like a bad idea to me) to get everyone's attention, and they all turn and look at the scary blood-spattered dude with the gun. Now they have to deal with the brakes, which Stephanie insists have overheated discs. No one will listen to her, because she's obviously a hysterical woman, but then Tony makes people shut up so they can hear the squealing. And then a disc blows up and shoots through the floor and buries itself in the ceiling of the car they're in, which lends a certain credence to her claims.

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Human Target

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