Episode Report Card
Jeff Long: B+ | Grade It Now!
Don’t Want No Short Short Escort

Damon bitches at Hammer that Darby texted him and he never responded. Damon points out that Hammer's got back and shouldn't be calling his sister names. He tells him to stay away from his sister and Hammer tells him to get out of his face before he kills him. Damon knocks the popcorn out of his hands and Darby's upset for Hammer... because he lost his popcorn. Meanwhile, Hammer's got Damon bent over a pool table and says he's going to kill the wienie motherfucker. Darby's the worst twin ever. She's not doing anything. This must be a fraternal thing. Ray walks in and breaks it up. Damon screams that he's handling it and Ray replies that he can see that. Embarrassing. If you're brave enough to wear nail polish to school though, especially that applied by a professional, you can deal with a little humiliation. Ray asks Hammer if he is himself and he says, "Yes, sir." Ray says, "First you upset my daughter. Now, you're about to hit my son. And you're twice as fat!" At least Ray notices that he and his ex-wife are knockouts and their children are different. I was wondering when the hell someone would speak the truth. Darby freaks out and says that Damon and Ray are ruining this for her. So, she goes outside to talk with Hammer. Poor Tracie says, "This sucks."

Ray and Damon watch the two talking. Ray assures Damon that he has his eye on them. Darby will not be riding home with Hammer. Then, he notices Damon is crying. He says he's not crying though. Then, he says that sometimes life is just too much. Poor Damon. He just wants to protect his twin and keep her close and she doesn't even care! Stupid Hammer. Ray tells Damon that you have to make lemonade out of life's lemons, if you like lemonade.

Back to Ray jogging, he passes Floyd Gerber. They're jogging in opposite directions. He stops Floyd and says hello, but Floyd acts like he doesn't know who Ray is. Then, he says that Ray shouldn't hang around Tanya because she's going places. And, Ray's a quitter. Then, he asks how Ray's vintage car business is going -- then runs away real fast.

Ray VO's that running into Floyd was like a bad dream. He didn't realize that he looked like a quitter to people. Meanwhile, Tanya is at her temp job. She's in a daze when a fellow worker asks her a question and startles her. She apologizes to her colleague for being off her game that night, but she replies, "Honey, I don't care." Tanya is frozen in a thought.

Ray tries to buy a structural beam with the money from his pickle jar. There's only $143. He asks the hardware store clerk if he could buy half of a beam and the guy says that $143 isn't enough for that, and who the hell sells half-beams? Ray stuffs his money back in the pickle jar and leaves.

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