I Love Money

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And Her Little Dog, Too

Heather realizes that this loss is a golden opportunity to get rid of one of the traitors on her team. Rodeo realizes this, too, and goes around sucking up to anyone who will grant her an audience. She corners Brandi and Megan in the bathroom, but they stick to the "whatever Whiteboy wants" party line. Since it's 12 Pack's birthday, in a fit of desperation, Rodeo pops open a package of pre-made cookie dough to bake some birthday chocolate chip cookies for him. I guess she's willing to do whatever it takes to stay, except make the cookies from scratch.

Craig dons a HazMat suit and a respirator and enters the Casa to announce that the Gold Team has to get into The Vault. First thing, Heather calls for a vote on Rodeo. Everyone except Hoopz raises their hands. As Heather heads for the check, Rodeo gets all schoolmarm-y (or Mr. Boston-y) and wags her finger in her face, telling her not to touch her check because there isn't a consensus. Rodeo is shocked that Toastee and Pumkin are voting for her despite the fact that she talked to them. Heather gives her the big whatever and they re-vote with Craig present to confirm the clear majority. As Craig puts her check in The Box, Rodeo rounds on 12 Pack and, a la the Soup Nazi, yells "No cake for you!" 12 Pack is unfazed. Hoopz quickly joins Rodeo in The Box, and Toastee volunteers her check as well. She is confident she is safe. As Megan prepares for her Power Suckup. Rodeo prepares for a trip to the county lockup for attempted assault on a birthday cake. She storms up to 12 Pack and slams his birthday cake down on the counter and screams about The Entertainer and betrayal. Megan is scared of her and the editors helpfully color Rodeo green and make her into a screaming Hulk of purported woman. 12 Pack remains unfazed. As the foursome heads to their Power Outing, Brandi, 12 Pack and Whiteboy eat Rodeo's mangled cake. Which is actually a cookie.

Okay, I know I mentioned this last week, but I must ask again: does Megan own clothing? All the other girls are wearing their swimsuits underneath shorts and shirts, but Megan is wearing a bikini and high heels and carrying a margarita like some castoff from a Jacqueline Susann novel, or Rock of Love. I sort of understand if she is trying to sway the male vote, but today she is Paymaster and the outing is all women. So I ask, seriously, does she own clothing? They pull up to the site of the Power Outing and Megan, her boobs, and her little dog toddle out of the van, but instead of seeing the typical cocktail-and-cabana set-up, all that's there is a rubber raft and a guide. She is bummed. They girls life-jacket up and float down the river while Megan makes Rodeo and her desperation do retarded things in pathetic attempts to convince Megan to let her stay. When they finally float to their lunch destination, Rodeo continues her blatant sucking up. She pours Megan and her little dog a vodka and Red Bull. She hugs Megan. She apologizes to Megan. She is horrifying in her penance.

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I Love Money

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