I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here!

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DeAnn Welker: C | Grade It Now!
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Hey! It's A Non-Elimination Episode!

At the Last Chance Saloon, it's miraculously not raining. They must be under a big tent. Damien asks them what it might mean if it's their last day in the jungle. They want to win, yadda, yadda. This could have been an hour. Easily. They're both in it to win it. Myleene explains the rules: They will be served five rounds of drinks. The winner of each round will be the first to down all the contents of their glasses. We see a glass with a tarantula in it, and one with a beetle. I really hope it's not smashed bugs in those glasses, but I wouldn't put it past this show. The first person to win three rounds goes back to camp. The loser leaves the jungle forever, "never to return." You know, unless someone else decides to leave tomorrow. John says there are things he won't do and things he doesn't do, but nothing he can't do. Let's hope.

First drink: Grasshopper cocktail, which is blended grasshopper and crickets. Holly gets her glass to the table first, and John thinks he's at a disadvantage because of his height. Which is sort of true, because it was a matter of seconds. Next drink: tarantula teaser, which is blended tarantula. John's bending over this time, to be closer to the drink. John wins that round, easily. Damien asks him what is was like to drink his worst fear. He says it tastes like pistachios, because in his mind that's what he likes so that's what it all tastes like. But then he tells us in confessional that it was hairy and gross and they spit out whatever wasn't caught in their teeth. Ew. Next drink: Dung beetle daiquiri. Which is somehow bright blue. John looks horrified, and we go to commercial. Right, because he drank tarantula, but won't drink that. Whatever.

We're back with the dung beetle daiquiri. It's in a martini glass. John barely gets it down first. Neither of them liked it, and she says it scratches your throat. He's not looking so hot, either. Damien tells us that if John gets one more, he wins. In case you can't count to three yourself. Next drink: scorpion sunrise, which has a dead scorpion floating in it. Damien says it's an "extra element," which I guess means they have to eat it. The drink is RED, by the way, so I don't actually know what's in it, but I don't think scorpions would be red. Also, who is paid to blend up creatures for this show? And where is PETA when we need them? (I'm kidding. Don't email me.) Holly gets that one first. They both swallow their scorpions whole, but Damien and Myleene make a big deal about her doing it, and she says it's stingy. Last drink: Chili coladas, which are hot pepper chilies blended into a glass. Um, really? John gets his glass down first, but Damien pretends it's too close to call and we have to "review the tape." We get to see it again, and it's still obvious. Damien says that after reviewing the tape, we will declare the winner... John. Wow, that fake drama was awesome.

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I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here!

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