FUTURE Marcus: "Blah blah blah, I really prepped Bobby for the debate."
Over at High Strung University, Grace yammers to her class about revisionist history. I get it; revisionist history is the very backbone of this show. Guess what? I'm still not impressed. She closes her lecture by telling the class to give their papers to "Tammy in the back." Tammy, the TA, in the back, looks really, really tired. Can you imagine working for Grace? I'd kill myself. Or her. No, I'd kill her. That's definitely the better option.
Apparently, however, Tammy has gone for the other option: suicide. She and Grace chat on the way out of the classroom. Grace needs to get those papers graded, and she also needs several chapters of Tammy's dissertation tout de suite. Tammy sobs that she's really got a lot of work to do for the other professors in the department and she's also a single parent, and now her babysitter wants to make it "six dollars an hour. Apparently, [her kid's] gotten twenty percent harder to take care of." Or maybe the babysitter realized that people stopped getting paid $5 an hour to babysit way back in 1985. It's hard for me to feel bad for Tammy when she's still not even paying minimum wage for child care. Anyway, Tammy does a lot of kissing up, and Grace eventually agrees to grade the papers herself. "We need people like you in the department, and you need to some to reconnect with your research," Grace announces. I gag. Who talks like that? Well, Grace, obviously. What was I thinking? Tammy promises to give Grace her chapter tomorrow. "Sisterhood is global, Tammy. Don't ever forget it," Grace speechifies. But Tammy should forget the khakis she's wearing, because they make her butt look really saggy and unfortunate.
High school. Jack and Toothy McCrabalot are working on their homework in the library. Dee Vine comes skipping up to them, and politely asks if she's interrupting anything. "Just Chemistry," Jack says. Hardy har har. I've seen more chemistry in a geometry class. Dee Vine asks Jack something about "Track Bash," and wonders if he's still coming. Jack is clearly taken by surprise, but says that he's totally going. Courtney, icily, wonders what "Track Bash" is. Dee turns to her and smiles. "Hi! You're the new girl whose dad is everyone's boss? I'm [Dee Vine]," Dee says, quite nicely. "You should so come! It's only cool people, so there's no line at the keg, and if there is, it's not annoying." Courtney makes a face like Dee just suggested that she brush her teeth with motor oil, but, seriously? Dee has a point. You don't want to be in line for beer with a bunch of dorks. Courtney mutters that she'll try. "Great! Jell-O shots go quick, so come early!" Dee says, and skips off. Here's the thing -- I suspect we're supposed to find her shallow or overly perky or something, but she's awfully nice to the new girl who's dating her ex. So she cares about Jell-O shots! So do a lot of people! Jell-O shots are really important. "So, that's the ex," Courtney says to Jack, snippily. He wonders how she knew that little factoid, and Courtney shrugs that word gets around. "Are you really gonna go? Because you should so come," Courtney mimics -- a bit meanly, really. Although, really, it's awfully rude to invite someone to a party, so I can see how she'd be upset. It's so unfortunate when people try to be nice and make friends. I really hate it when that happens. Shut up, Courtney. Jack wonders what the big deal is. She could come to the party, he says, and meet some of his friends. "I think [Dee] was plenty," Courtney snots. Jack tells her that his friends are pretty cool, and she counters by asking how cool they could be when they didn't even tell him about the party. Yawn. Can't someone set the school on fire or something? Jack insists he did know about the party. Did he know about the party? Didn't he know about the party? Who knew about the party and when did they know it? Better call in the Warren Commission. "Whatever, I'm just not interested," Courtney snips. Oh, Courtney. You're a very cute girl, but you're not nearly hot or charismatic or funny enough to get away with being such a total pain in the ass all the time. You keep acting like this and people are going to stop inviting you places and it will be your own fault. Jack, in fact, is finally fed up, and tells her to suit herself. He gets up from the table. "You don't have to spend your whole high-school career in a cave just to prove you're not shallow," he tells her, and leaves. Thank God someone said something to her about that bad attitude. Courtney makes a face like she sat on a protractor.
FUTURE Marcus. I don't even know. He said words, and they came out in an order that seemed to make sense, but they meant nothing. Something about the debate being hard.