Barto fondles Ferret as Ferret looks glum. They are in the waiting room of the so called "Imaging Center." Barto acts compulsively gung-ho about Ferret's impending recovery; Ferret asks him to be her boyfriend, not her doctor. A nurse arrives to ferry to her doom -- I mean, room! -- forbidding Barto entry to the Imaging Sanctum. Barto fidgets in the lobby, wearing his best "Don't Fear the Reaper" face. Ferret assures him she'll be fine.
Back at the Habitrail Hideout, Ick ushers Ill to her door and embarks on an exegesis of her keys. "They used to be all color coded, with little plastic rings," she begins, concluding that now, for whatever reason, her key-coding system is "kaput!" She says "kaput" in such guttural tones that I assume her gender identity scam will now be exposed -- though it's anyone's guess what Madame Butterfly antics she employed during their last encounter. Ill looks annoyed and laughs listlessly, compelling Ick to ask, "Why do you even want to come in anyway?" He's on the ropes immediately, stuttering explanations as Ick goes for the jugular. "Funny how a couple days ago we were greatest wish, horse-and-carriage material and now I'm getting rain checks, and you've got 'stuff' to do --" Sorry, Ick, but if you wanted to come off like a Rules girl, then you shouldn't have dropped trou on the first date. At any rate, it comes out that Ill thought Ick was "in a weird place" emotionally, as opposed to in the video closet with her chilling ex-flame. They reproach each other for becoming so alienated over an unfortunate word choice on Ick's part. Before you know it they're in another torrid clinch, with Ick baring her gums in vulpine delight. "You want to go inside?" she asks Ill, who waits a beat before saying, "No." Fade out on Ick's incredulous horse face saying, "What?!"
Thank God, it's the relatively chaste and small-mouthed Elispa, with the rather charming Mr. E. They open the door of Mr. E's apartment to reveal a turbo-charged fire hazard, with candles burning on every surface and rose petals carpeting the floor. The Acoustic Meanderings of Burgeoning Love Despite Dead Spouses begin to waft as Mr. E says "Happy Valentine's Day" to Elispa's "Oh my God!" She trudges through the petals, opening and closing her mouth like a fish as Mr. E claims he "couldn't help it." Elispa takes issue with this statement and Mr. E says, "You didn't really want me not to do anything, did you?" She wheels around all "J'accuse!" and says, "We had a deal!" Her objection, apparently, is that he lavished her with luxury without giving her the opportunity to reciprocate in kind. So much for her Marxist principles. Mr. E's solution is to give her a gift-wrapped guitar string he bought for himself and tell her to give it to him. Simp that she is, Elispa is won over by this tsunami of sap staged by Mr. E. She dithers appreciatively.













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