Jack & Jill
Animal Planet, Part II

Episode Report Card
Tumbleweed: D | Grade It Now!
The Foul Nine Yards

Meanwhile, Mikey and Lucy walk amiably on the solitary street of ManNOTtan, no doubt discussing the Hegelian dialectic. They pause and exchange kisses, but sadly, a cute couple this is not.

Elispa and Mr. E, by contrast, seem as innocent as small woodland creatures as they blow out every last candle in the tinderbox fire hazard that is Mr. E's apartment. Elispa wears a way Amish apron over an ankle-length skirt, and Mr. E has grown a neck beard and carries a buggy whip. Okay, that was true except for the last part.

Anyway, it wouldn't be Jack and Jill if the show didn't conclude with a scene featuring the eponymous protagonists in a post-coital stupor. And what do you know, they're back in the greenhouse again. Where's Farmer MacGregor when you need him? Ick asks, "How did we let all that happen?" They quibble over how much time has passed while I notice that the bags of mulch they're lying on are color-coded to their outfits. "We started overthinking," says Ill, and Ick insists, "You started it!" "You ran with it!" Ill says. Ick bobbles her matted head and says, "Let's not do that anymore." Ill says, "Okay. It's gonna be hard, though. Especially for you." He lunges to make out with her and she fends him off, giggling with self-enthralled rapture. But soon they are on each other like buzzards on road kill. Ick shivers as Ill removes her coat and Ill suggests that they go downstairs. He starts to get up, but Ick regards him with her eightieth feral smile of the episode and drags him back down for another unsanitary romp amid the fertilizer. The camera flees the greenhouse as the screen flashes the name of the Satan responsible for this dreck: the abominable "Randi Mayem Singer."

Next week: Elispa moves in, and her presence hinders Ick and Ill from copulating.

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Jack & Jill




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