Jack & Jill
Starstruck

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The Barto And Ferret Show

Nice restaurant. Barto is telling Audrey about the keen research facilities they have at Duke, and apparently Justin Kirk got his script only five minutes before this scene was filmed because he can't properly pronounce any of the medical terms. Audrey interrupts him to say, "Oh my God, did I tell you they're putting me up at the Chateau Marmont?" Barto hesitantly tries to continue with his story, but Audrey's cell phone rings. The conversation goes: "No. NO. Really? What did he say about me?" She then tells Barto, "Ed Burns told Dan he heard about me from SPIKE!" I think they were probably talking about the Marmont's shockingly lax policies when it comes to feral rodents, but Audrey continues to get more good news about herself. Barto looks let down. Audrey tells Barto that Dan got them tickets to the Michael Mann premiere tomorrow night. Look, I'm glad that someone over at the WB is getting good use of their subscription to Premiere, but for chrissakes, name-dropping does NOT give this show any much-needed verisimilitude. Just at that moment, Little Orphan Annie runs up and greets Barto, congratulating him heartily and giving him a big hug. "Thank you," Barto says, sounding sincerely grateful. Audrey is so busy taking a swim in Lake Audrey, as the writers so appetizingly phrased it earlier in the season, that she actually looks pleased to see LOA and waves. Annie invites Barto to a study session (???) at @Bar. Barto declines, then invites Annie to join them. Annie refuses, since she doesn't want to interrupt, but Barto motions to the yapping Ferret, gnawing happily away at her cell phone as if it were the foot of fresh roadkill, and says that obviously that's not a problem. The Ferret giggles, obviously pleased with herself, and her grin makes her look terrifyingly similar to one of the velociraptors in Jurassic Park right before it went in for the kill. Barto looks disgruntled.

"Good for Barto," Jack murmurs as she and Jill prepare a romantic candlelit dinner. Jack sports a lovely puce-colored chemise in this scene that barely covers her nipples and makes her boobs look droopier than the bags underneath Huckleberry Hound's eyes. And Jill is wearing a shortstop t-shirt. They talk about Jill leasing the apartment " . . .unless." They talk about Jack having the place all to herself all summer " . . . unless." They discuss how good dinner is. Then Jill says, "When should I move my stuff in?" and Jack says, "Tonight would be fine." Yes, kids, Amanda Peet and Ivan Sergei are indeed romantic comedians on a par with Cary Grant and Katharine Hepburn, or, say, the Captain and Tennille.

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Jack & Jill

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