Jake 2.0
Jerry 2.0

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: B+ | Grade It Now!
Big Brother Is Squashing Your Game

Jerry's in the spooky militia garage. Fulton punches him in the gut and says, "You took my son away from me, Foley! And you need to know that that was a mistake!" Jerry gets brutally beaten as Fulton rants about family and how Jake will pay for what he did. Jerry collapses on the floor with blood on his lip and gasps, "I'm...not...Jake."

Fulton takes a militia thug aside and shows him Jerry's real ID. The thug is upset, almost girlishly so. "Oh...god! He was spouting off at the bar!" He takes out his gun and slides it across a desk to Fulton. "I failed you." Fulton looks at the gun, then back at the thug. He passes the gun back across the desk and says Thug didn't fail. "You might have saved my son's life."

War Room. Jake walks in and asks what's going on. Welll...your little brother has been captured. Kidnapped. And the militia wants an exchange -- Kid Suspect for Jerry. They have one hour to release Kid Suspect, or Jerry's dead. Jake starts to stammer at breakneck speed. Leader says grimly, "The NSA does not negotiate with terrorists." Silver Fox says strongly, "We do not. Negotiate. I'm very sorry." Jake says, "We have to help him!" Aww!

Leader walks down the hall with Jake on her like white on Wonder Bread. He has to do something! Jerry needed him and he wasn't there! Leader repeats the party line: The NSA doesn't negotiate with terrorists. Leader says, "I can't go down to Kid Suspect's cell and let him out. I. Can't do that. You've got ten minutes." Jake takes off.

At the militia garage, a thug tells Jerry he's about to find out how much his brother loves him. "He's got twenty-five minutes." But Jake has ten? Oh, whatever. We're fifty minutes into the episode, so WE have ten minutes, give or take a commercial break, an epilogue, and scenes from next week.

Using the Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee! power, Jake sends the security guard on a goose chase, overrides the security code on the Plexiglas habitat, and springs Kid Suspect. He makes all the security cameras turn away their lenses and takes the stairs. They make it into his car, and Jake tosses Kid Suspect a cell phone and says if he ever wants to see his father again, he'll call him, NOW. KS dials.

The Silver Fox steps into Leader of the Pack's office and asks what she knows about Kid Suspect's breakout from "our supposedly secure lockdown." Leader says she's aware, and on top of it. Silver Fox is cool with that.

Jake rushes into the militia garage, and swaps Kid Suspect for Jerry. Wow, that was like a four-minute-long kidnapping. The other militia thugs appear to be packing up their cache of weapons and moving on. It's what militias do, says Fulton. Jake asks why Fulton doesn't let his son have a life. Fulton says his life is here, with his family. Jake goes to leave, then overhears (thanks, nanites) the SWAT team outside. A boom-boom-boom shoot-out follows. The smoke hasn't even cleared when The Man comes in asking to see everyone's hands. Leader is there too, looking over The Man's shoulder. Kid Suspect doesn't make it -- he's killed. Fulton cradles him and moans, "No." Yes. Jake holds the beaten and bloody Jerry and gives his team a weary thumbs-up.

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Jake 2.0




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