We have a "previously" sequence to start us off with: Meet Jake, affable tech support guy for the NSA. There's Sarah, his blonde college crush. Whoosh, there's the lab accident that infected him with nanites, the tribble-y computer-y things that get all up in ya bloodstream. Dr. Thora explains that "every one of his body systems is enhanced," and my mind goes right in the gutter thinking about every one of Christopher Gorham's body functions and how their being enhanced might make me, well, happier. Agent, boss-lady of the NSA, says she's been authorized to create a special ops team with Jake at its core. I think I want Jake at my core. Oh, sorry. I'll back on out of the gutter now.
Washington, D.C. Well, it's fake D.C., since this is shot in Vancouver. Jake bursts out of a rooftop stairwell and runs, fast. Aww, look how cute his messenger bag is! A strapping man aims a missile launcher at him and lets one fly. Jake outruns it, then in a very bo-bo Triple X shot, leaps off the turret the missile explodes into. Jake's explode-fueled leap is impressive, and the sounds effects very Wonder Woman-ian. Can I just make a wish right now? It's a wish I made a long time ago, back when I was recapping Now and Again. Just this. Two little words: Robot. Dog. Do it. I so dare you. I mean, this show may have a great beginning, but it is still UPN. You take away Grunge Slacker, fine. But give me my crime-fighting robot dog. Back to the action: Jake scrambles over a roof and makes his way into a building.
Once inside, there's a shoot-out. Jake jumps down about a story, shooting away. Then on the ground, he uses his super-hearing (mee mee mee mee mee!) to hear a foe panting behind a tank. Jake gets him next. Then, looking super-cute in his brown suede jacket, he uses his super-sight to home in on yet another opponent, and blows him away. Jake smiles. He's killin' real good! Way to go, nerd. Then, ruh-roh. His super-hearing tips him off to two dudes that come right up behind him, demanding Jake drop his weapon and hand over the cute messenger bag. Jake wheels around and shoots, but his gun clicks, empty and impotent. He isn't blown away, though. Jake does not crumple to the floor, riddled in bullets. He just squinches up his face and says, "Whaaaat?" Green lights are thrown on all over the warehouse, revealing it to be a set of some kind. The Man strides out and says, "Jake, you failed the simulator again. You have to count your shots! Twelve in the mag, one in the pipe."