Episode Report Card
Keckler: A | Grade It Now!
Jake Goetz Mad

In some room in the PD, Jimmy awkwardly hands over some prints to Hawkins, asking, "There -- how's that?" Hawkins barely glances at it and frowns, "Yeah, Jimmy, that's fine." Jimmy walks off, staring down at the prints he lifted as if afraid he'll lose them. Jimmy's kind of like a retarded dog. He's big, sweet, eager, and dumb. Once Jimmy's gone, Hawkins goes over and fiddles with the clip and baggie. Jake walks in and asks whether he should take it as a good sign that Hawkins isn't in jail yet. Hawkins tells him that Beck is conflicted and not 100% signed up to Cheyenne yet. "What makes you think that?" Jake asks. "Well, he's not a guy trying to wrap up a mission," Hawkins explains. "He's curious, he wants to know the truth." Hawkins adds that, with Darcy banished from the sheriff's office, he's going to need Jake's help on the inside. "Yeah, well, we might have a problem with that; I'm about to do something that might cost me my badge," says Jake. "No," Hawkins tells him. "No?" Jake echoes. "NO!" Hawkins repeats. Jake gets all angsty and frustrated on the table. Hawkins hisses that they can't lose Jake's badge, since it gives them access to intel. "What's going on with you, Jake?" Hawkins demands. "Look, I might not have a choice, all right-- " Jake starts, but Jimmy clumps back into the room, interrupting them. "Those prints weren't good enough," Jimmy explains, gesturing vaguely behind him. "No?" Hawkins asks, totally not surprised. "Try these," says Hawkins, handing over another set. "Oh, yeah, that's better," Jimmy mumbles, walking out, again with his nose glued to these new prints. See? Trusting. Retarded dog. Hawkins could lick the lifted prints and Jimmy would still believe they're good if Hawkins tells him so. Jake leaves without explaining the vaccine issue to Hawkins.

Med Center. Kenchy, the Senior Suppressed-Virus Correspondent, bursts through some doors, telling Emily that he can't get involved. Emily pleads that she wouldn't ask him if they weren't in serious trouble. She starts to explain about Goetz, but Kenchy stops her: "I have seen what he is capable of. And I will not go against him!" Huh. Aasif Mandvi shaking his ductile cheeks emphatically is something you never get to see him do on the The Daily Show. Emily continues to plead about protecting the town. Kenchy slams down his files and instructs, "You administer the vaccine on the fleshy part of the body. Okay? No one who is ill, no one who is getting ill, no one with egg allergies -- that is very important. Now, children, six months to two years, pinch the fleshy part of the thigh and administer the vaccine quickly -- the quicker the better, now. We don't to need to get everybody -- just 75 to 80% of high risks, and then we've achieved herd immunity." Emily writes down "heard immunity" but really didn't get the rest. Whatever. If Heather were here, she wouldn't even need a pen. She'd just take "herd immunity," whack out a solution to the differential equation based on the town's pop and risk factors, and run with it. Emily, however, is not Heather. "'Heard immunity'?" she blondes. "Yes, herd immunity," Kenchy repeats, "It's like when-- " It's the opposite of critical mass, EMILY! Emily pleads with Kenchy to help her do her homework so that she can go to cheerleading practice.

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