Jericho
Jericho

Episode Report Card
Keckler: B | 486 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Weekend At New Bernie

Ted's Non-Unabomber Cabin. Maggie's deputy cuffs her to the open car door -- ever notice how tough guys have a thing about leaving all four car doors open? Like closing them would somehow undermine their bad-assery? -- and goes off to find out what happened to the other two. Things are way too quiet for Hawkins and blood not to be involved. Maggie stands there, scared. A figure comes tearing out of the house, gun leveled in both hands. It's Hawkins, and he wants to know who Maggie is. "Don't shoot!" Maggie yells, crouching and putting all the hands up she can. "I'm with Jake! I'm with Jake! Columbus! Columbus!" Maggie yells and says "Columbus" about five more times, squalling that Jake told her to say Columbus and that they were in prison together and she was sent to help. Hawkins frisks her and she whispers "Columbus! Columbus!" a few more times. "Okay, okay!" Hawkins says to shut her up, "I got it." But he still has his gun on her.

"How's Jake doing?" Hawkins asks so carefully I wonder if it's a trick question. "He's okay," Maggie gasps. "Yeah?" Hawkins hands over some keys. Maggie undoes her cuffs as Ted walks up. Hawkins makes with the intros. "Where are the cops?" she asks, probably knowing the answer. "They've been dealt with," Hawkins says casually, gun still up. OH YEAH THEY HAVE! THEY'RE DEAD! (I swear I wasn't such a champion of television death before. There's just something about this show.) "Yeah," Ted mutters with a look that says "Believe me," and he adds, "You don't want to go in there." BECAUSE OF ALL THE BLOOD AND BRAINS! Hawkins sort of rolls his eyes at this. Ted hands over a bag, saying, "Here, this is everything" and clears his throat uncomfortably, which makes me wonder what the hell is in the bag. A head? A few kneecaps for later? The penile leavings of a disturbed London diner? Hawkins checks out the contents as Maggie asks what the plan is. "Plan?" Hawkins repeats, as though they don't need no stinking plans. He explains, "There's going to be an explosion in town. Hopefully, it will cause enough chaos that we can somehow get Jake and Eric out of there." Maggie thinks she can help; she has an in with Constantino. It's left hanging, so I'm sort of wondering if she's his constabine.

Jericho

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