Hawkins' Happy Hunting Hut. Hawkins stares at a vibrating cell phone before finally answering it with a simple, "Yeah." On second thought, a "yeah," is never simple with Hawkins, because he turns it into three syllables. "Yee-aw-uh." His mystery friend is on the other end of the line, and the time has come for some partial explanations as demanded by Hawkins. Mystery Man will only say that his name is "John Smith," which makes me suspect that his middle name could very possibly be: "Jacob Jingle-Heimer." Ironically, that's my name, too. More explanations are that Hawkins doesn't know Jingle-Heimer, but Jingle-Heimer knows Hawkins and proves it by talking about the betrayal of Sarah Mason and project Red Bell and Valente and Chavez and Cheung. Jingle-Heimer has info for Hawkins but he needs to be assured that Hawkins won't try to find him. Hawkins just snaps the phone shut in response. The phone vibrates. Hawkins answers and awesomes, "Let's agree on this: YOU don't make the terms. I do. And if you have information to share, then you just share it. But if you lie to me, know that I will find out and the next time we speak, it will not be on the phone." That's because the next time they speak Jingle-Heimer will be dead! Jingle-Heimer agrees and then tells Hawkins he's a day away from being caught.
Tonight's Morse code message is: "Keckler is being held hostage and couldn't transmit last week's message, which was: 'I'm being held hostage. Send help. Wait, no, send Jake and Hawkins.'"
Exercising their right to assemble and have a bitchfest, a gaggle of Jerichoians complains about how J&R is thwarting all their efforts to turn a profit. For instance, buying from Frodale is the only way Mary can keep her lushes lubricated without going out of business. Apparently, J&R changes a buttload for merchandise and supplies, but won't let anyone raise their prices because there's a price freeze handed down by Cheyenne. There are a few other hard luck stories via whining farmers and so forth. Stanley interjects that it's not that big of a deal, "We're talking about booze and cows, here!" "And the Stamp Act and the Sugar Act," Emily illustrates. "What are you talking about?" Stanley demands, in hysterically suspicious tones. He's all, "Wait, what's going on with sugar now? Because I need it for my Cheerios." Emily asks him, "The Boston Tea Party -- was it just about tea?" It is clear from the furrowed brow that that's exactly what Stanley thinks, so help him out a little. The boy clearly slept through the better part of U.S. History. They all start arguing about revolution, well, you know. Despite Eric and Jake's best efforts to calm things down, there's still a lot of argumentation and finally Stanley walks out, wanting no part of it; he won't let them use his land to bring in illegal supplies. Jake tells everyone to calm down and Eric promises they will find another way to get supplies into town. Just then, Darcy walks into the bar and looks at Jake pointedly.